I quit smoking on March 22, 2011 with Electronic Cigarettes

Saturday, February 7, 2009

The definition of MORON

mo⋅ron  [mOE-Ron]

1. a person who is notably stupid or lacking in good judgment.
2. Psychology. a person of borderline intelligence in a former classification of mental retardation, having an intelligence quotient of 50 to 69.
3. Anyone who ends up digging post holes 'cause they were on the wrong side of the fence.

Well, we were about through with the hog pen. We had gotten the 8 large posts in the ground. and 20 small ones. All of the panels were set up against the places they were going to be nailed.

We had worked it where the majority of it was being nailed on the inside. Because when a pig (or anything) roots or leans against a fence, you dont want them leaning on/ pushing the fence away from the posts. Your staples are more likely to pop out, which means you in turn will be chasing said livestock from Hell to Breakfast. Where as if the fence is on the inside, the posts on the outside and your staples are on the inside, they aint puttin the pressure against them.

Well, when you are making a square, there will be some that have to go outside. (on the large corner posts), and on those we made sure the small posts in between were on the outside so we could nail to the inside of them.

This worked out well, until we got to the dido that BR put in it. The wire was crooked, had a bow in it, and just generally looked like hammered dog poo. So, while I was in the house searching for my hammer and gloves, he pulled up those.

I finally found my hammer. That I had asked him a dozen times if he had seen.
It was with all his other tools. Right beside the drill and drill bits that we would need to put up the gate. I never did find my gloves, These are the ones I keep in the door of my truck. Cause I never know when I am going to end up doing something nasty and need them. BUT being lazy ole me, when I used them building fence last time I brought them in the house and laid them down. And I do remember seeing Rayley putting them on Bows feet so he could walk around and look like a duck.

Anyway, I loaded up the drill, the drill bits, and my precious hammer and started down. I wouldnt need my gloves, all I was going to be doing was hammering. I shouldnt get a splinter or pinch my fingers with the wire. My hands would get pretty dirty, and my nails would be broken, but oh well.. they wash and will grow back.

When I got out there we proceeded to nail up the panels. No problem. He was inside the fence, I was outside, I would lean against the smaller posts he was nailing into. My shoulder is bruised from him wacking the staples and the post wacking me. No matter how hard I tried to lean into it, it was still brutal.

Then we get to the one he pulled up the middle posts on. We nailed it to the large posts and went to the next one.

Then it was the gate. they come with these very large screw/ hinge things. you have to screw them into the corner post. No problem. that went very smooth. You can screw them in our out more or less to adjust the drag on the gate (the height at which the gate sits or doesnt sit on the ground), and how close the gate is to the post.

This is the smoothest and easiest we have EVER installed a gate. And we have done MANY gates.

Then it was time to reset the new posts.
BR was inside the fence, he was digging the post hole for it. and I was walking around, double checking the staples, and adding a few where I thought more were needed onthe posts that had to be stapled on the outside.

I kinda felt sorry for him having to redig this hole. But, the other two times we had done it he had used the auger on the tractor. so in almost 30 postholes, he actually only manually dug the one when we broke the pin. So digging these two wouldnt kill him. I mean dont get me wrong, he had to clean the edges up, or shave off a few more inches of dirt on most of them. and clean out the holes. But no actual digging except the one.

BR called me over and asked me to eyeball the post he had just sank and tamped into the ground.

I went over and we discussed it still being kinda wonky looking, but decided that if any pig complained about the accomidations we would simply shoot it, skin it, and cook it.

Then, BR went to get the staples, since I was on the outside I would hammer them in.
Then it dawned on me. and I opened my mouth.
One day I will learn to keep my big mouth shut.
But at this point I wasnt comprehending that I had just screwed myself.

So, I asked BR why come the fence was on the outside of the post.
"I dont know..." he replied
Then he pulled up the post, handed it to me and I tried putting it on THIS side of the fence. While I was dropping it in, I felt the tender skin rip on my precious little hand. and I felt a searing pain. I looked. I had a splinter the size of a landscape timber embeded in my palm. and the bad part was, it BROKE about 1/8 of in inch in and I couldnt get it out!

I kept favoring my hand, it hurt like the dickens. But was trying not to be a baby.
SO, I had throwed the post into the hole.
It was too close in. it would have to be dug out. So, I pulled it up and threw it down. My poor hand was throbbing at this point.

THEN he proceeded to hand me the post hole diggers and told me to make this hole a little bigger. I ended up digging the hole to double the size. Basicly digging my own post hole beside his. And it was 2 feet deep! In clay!

We set that pole with me doing all the shoveling of the dirt and tamping of course- cause the fence was between him and the post, and he couldnt get to it to tamp, and he nailed in the staples.

THen we moved down a few feet and he said "go ahead and dig right here"
So, me, being the ditzy blonde that I am, went at it with gusto.
Till about the 4th time he gave me direction on how to dig a post hole. Then it dawned on me. I was a mo-freakin-ron.

But, I finished digging the hole. I was favoring my poor hand. wondering at which point I would have to get stiches when I was digging out this pine sapling later with a pocket knife and tweezers, and BR said "GOOD LORD, what is wrong with you? why are you favoring your hand?"
"I got a splinter"
"let me see you big baby"
"Dont poke it, it hurts"
"titty baby"
so I showed him my hand. Not really wanting to hear his crap.
"oh, that is a pretty good one.. "
I almost fainted.
Then he said "but you can still work with it, lets finish up"
So, my dumb self started making sure my hole was clean.
In the post went, I shovled in the dirt (and this REALLY didnt feel good on my poor sensitive palm), and then I had to tamp it. tamping involoves an old axe handle, or something simmular, where you hit the dirt pretty hard to make sure its packed. We were using a shovel. turned upside down of course.

When I was done I looked up at BR, he was holding Bow, who had been screaming and getting into everything. He kept getting in or getting out of the pen and then wanting back in. or emptying out 5 lbs of staples on the ground. He would play for a little while, then want to be held.
So I looked up at BR, holding this snot nosed little brat and asked him just how in the hell I had managed to get screwed into all of that work while he stood there.
"luck of the draw I reckon" was his awnser.

So, BR stapled the wire up and I picked up my toys and headed to the house. He said he was going to make sure there was enough staples and Rayley stayed to hand them to him.

When we got to the house, Bow went right to sleep. He was wore out. BR came in, had some lunch and then went back to work.

After he went I went around and picked up his drill, and hammer, and bits, and such and put them away. So we could find them next time. I swear, he has sat string for the weedeater on the counter before, and then the NEXT summer, a YEAR later, when he needed it, got mad because it wasnt there anymore. I ended up getting a 5 gallon bucket (its camoflauged, I won it at the wild turkey banquet, and has a seat cover on the lid) and setting it under the counter where he stacks his stuff, so I could clear it off every once in a while and I just shove it in there.

But the pen is done. Till it dawned on me that we hadnt built the lean to yet. I will have to get the tin and some lumber to build that next week.

Oh and I did finally get the splinter out. it was huge! at least a half inch, and as big around as a pencil. Okay, not a full pencil, but as big around as the lead. and not the lead in a mechanical pencil either. (BR asked me that, when he asked if I ever got it out and I told him yes).
I ended up having to split the entire length of it with a knife, and dig it out. cause it didnt just go under the skin, it went in at an angle and was pretty deep.

I am almost certain it was pert near poking out the other side. But BR said I was full of it.

Thursday, February 5, 2009

I got an award!! Lemonade Award

A VERY nice lady awarded me with this honor.
Eboni has a great blog with lots of great recipies on it. I have made a few of them, and they are true down home cooking. WELL worth your time :)

I am awarding:
1. cakewrecks because I never fail to laugh when I go there! If you think you are the only person to ever get a screwed up cake, you HAVE to go and see. Her sense of humor is great and the content is .... sad... But I promise, if you dont gasp "OH MY GOD" at least once, or laugh your rear off, you need a sense of humor implant!

2. a mom today My mentor on making money on the internet. She has taught me so much, and makes me laugh all the time. A mom of 4, and a soon to be new Grandma, she has a sense of humor and grasp on life that many people envy. But of all her sites, this one, about her experiences as a mom is great.

3. Firehouse
A look inside a REAL firehouse. Sheena and Rick will keep you in stiches, while telling you about the real dangers they face. These are true heros and a true family.

4. Jane4girls She feeds herself and 3 teenage kids on LESS THAN 800.00 a YEAR!! She is a coupon and deal finding Guru, and even if you feel you dont have time to coupon, checking out her blog can motivate anyone! Or at least make you jealous beyond belief!

5. Queen B This blog I am nominating because, it makes me LMAO. In a sick, and twisted, sort of way. I think we ALL know a woman like 'her'. And if we dont, we should. They make us look NORMAL!!

6. My Direct Sales Audrey can teach you ALOT. everything from HOW to be a better salesperson, or more interesting and needed person in general, to how to be organized (she is the GOTO tupperware gal). Her blog is worth checking out if you want to learn more about selling your product, or your image.





I will be nominating 4 more people shortly. Right now real life calls and I cant finish. I despise real life sometimes. But just getting these links to these 6 has taken from 5:30am to 10:30am.

I need a petition to get high speed internet. Or need Hughes net to offer me a free dish in exchange for advertising.

But I promise I will get the others on here tommorow.

When you post your award, please:
1. Put the lemonade logo on your blog or post.
2. Nominate 10 other bloggers who you think demonstrate good attitude and/or gratitude.
3. Link to your nominees within your post.
4. Comment on their blog to let them know they have received this award.
5. Link back to this post and the person whom you received this award from.

Monday, February 2, 2009

a square peg in a round hole.

Gosh, its been a long time. I swear I have meant to come in and post. But its been a busy week. I dont know from what. Cause I have NOTHING to show for it. BUT it must have been busy, cause I havent had time to come in here. :)

not a whole lot has been happening. I did spend the last part of last week baking a cake for my mother in law. She loved it by the way. Since I made her cut it and eat it, she wants a picture blown up of it so she can hang it on the wall. She is a bubble off plumb.

That only took me two days. Then Saturday we spent the day driving to Lousianna to get our Taxes done. My Mother in Law Martha and I did that is.

Its not a bad drive. Its about 40 miles to the border, then 40 miles or so past that. BUT, once you cross the Sabine River into Louisianna the speed limit changes. HEre in Texas its 70. and 75 is the norm. my truck runs best anywhere from 76-78. So I try to accomedate it as much as possible. (hey, it keeps the injectors from rusting up. I swear it does).

BUT, once you cross that bridge you are sent into a world that is awful. Just AWFUL. the speed limit changes to 55. I kid you not. I drove for over 20 miles before I saw another soul. There was NOONE in front of me. Noone behind me, it was a flat road, no hairpin curves or switchbacks. Just regular driving and you cant go over 55. I tried. very hard. I would even set my cruise. Next thing I know, I would be going 80 again. I didnt know it was possible to count the leaves on the trees while driving. But if you are required to drive 55 you can.

And I think I know why they have decided to torture people in this way. Folks over yonder are too stupid to drive faster. They would be sitting at a crossroad, see me coming from a mile away, and then right about the time I would creep up on them, being passed by all manner of flying insects, they would jump right out in front of me. And, had I not seen it with my own eyes, I wouldnt belive it was possible in this day and age, with modern cars mind you, these people would manage to jump out in front of me, then they would slowly build up to 15mph. then 20, 25, 30, 35, 40, 45, 50.

Yep, they wouldnt HIT 55. and it would take miles for them to reach the top speed of 50.

On the way back I was in a line with about 6 other cars from Texas. the closer we got to the border, the faster we would get. I know they were thinking the same thing I was. That if they didnt get back to the homeland fast they would end up having an anurisim.

When you could see that limestone Texas in the distance, everyone gas choked it.

Not 5 miles on the Heaven side, we all of a sudden slowed down to 50. I kid you not. we went from pert near 80 miles an hour to 50. We were trying to jump out and go around, but couldnt ever get a clear shot. And for some reason this ... person.. wouldnt get over on the shoulder to allow us to pass. This is something you DO in Texas. If you are incapable of driving the speedlimit, then get OVER. Its just the nice thing to do.

SO, eventually, one by one we all manage to get around this person. And what do we see as we pass? A Lousisanna licence plate. Wouldnt you know it. Its bad enough these people drive like mor-ons in their own state. Then they cross the border and act like they own the road over here.

I wonder if they ever made it to their destination. I cant imagine how long it would take to drive across the state, or even get to a good sized town driving that slow. I mean from Orange (75 miles south of me) to El Paso, is further, than from Orange to Chicago. I kid you not.

Oh, and while over yonder we went to a Dairy Queen. It was just Martha, me and Bow. We ate and as we were leaving I got Bow a malt. Well,[strike] Dumbdumb [/strike] Martha GAVE Bow his malt. to walk out with. I told her not to do it. But she didnt listen. Again, I said "dont do that!" and she said "aww why not, he's cute"
WHen he got it in his hands he took one look at it and headed for the back of the place! After 3 steps he did a face plant in the floor and chocolate malt went everywhere.
This woman raised 4 kids. How did she NOT see this catastrophe coming? It doesnt take a rocket surgeon to know that a one year old is going to fall. usually quickly.
I simply picked him up, and toted him out. she came out a few minutes later with a new malt- and said that the girls that worked there said there was no charge, he was too cute for words and they hoped he enjoyed it.

Sunday BR wanted to find a place for a hog pen. So we did. And he said that he would build my chicken coop finally. We will put it beside the hog pen.

THen today he decided that since no oil had been called in, he would just go to town and we would get the material to build it. So, we spent all day working on that.

We had some 6X6's left over that didnt burn in the old house. They are 80 years old. We have been saving them to put in the new addition, but decided to use them as fence posts. Since they are 16ft long we had to cut them with a chain saw, so we did that. No problem.

We had bought some hog pannel, So we are not stretching wire. Thats a plus, EXCEPT when you are using panels, they are NOT forgiving. You have to drill the post hole in the exact place that you need to put it. and make sure that you are not too far in or too far out.

We were putting down 8 of the large posts. Then will go back in with 3 inch posts and put them every 4 feet between the big posts. The pen is NOT square. By design. BR decided to make it an odd shape, I fiqure its cause he decided making somehting NOT square was easier than trying to make it square. It aint. But its 20 ft on the front, and the other sides are all 32. The pannels are 16 ft long and we have a 4 ft gate on the front. And it makes a dido on one side, I am not real sure why, I think its just for the fun of it.

When we went to town BR was rushing me in Tractor Supply. Asking why I was walking around, waht I was looking for. Typical man questions while shopping. I told him I wasnt sure, but there was SOMETHING we were not buying. Finally I gave up, went and paid for the hog panel and we went to Lowes. Then we realized that we hadnt bought a gate. I kid you not.

So I called to find out the price. Tractor Supply had been almost 20.00 cheaper on hog panel then Lowes. Well, they made up for it on the gates. 35.00 more. Of course we had already paid for our staples at Lowes and I had to go back in and buy the gate.

I also went by the feed store. I needed horse feed. and told her I would be buying chickens this year and asked when she needed my order. She said "now". They are already getting in chicks.

NOw, if you have never had chickens, there are a few things you need to know. First of all. you buy baby chicks. like 1-5 day old chicks. And they are pretty fragile. They have to stay warm. You cant just put a bowl of water in there. They will drown in it, and they have to have a special food. Plus, like all birds they dont discriminate when they poo. and dont mind walking, laying, eating or dying in it.

Thats another thing. Sometimes, baby chicks will just die. no reason. just die.

Oh and they have to stay warm. and I dont mean ' nice 70* warm' I mean like 95* with a heat lamp warm. But NOT too warm. cause they will bake. you cant warm up part of the cage and let the other part be normal temp. cause they will get to one part and freeze to death, or in the other part and bake.

These things really are DUMB. You've heard the saying "aint got the sense to get in out of the rain?" that came from a chicken. Cause baby chicks will look up at the sky if it rains and drown.

OH and there can be no breeze blowing on them. Yep. I am serious.

Plus, with their constant chirping, they are a HUGE draw for preditors. Snakes will come in and eat a whole brood in just a few minutes. I have had that happen.

Or minks, skunks, coons, coyotes, you name it, they will come.

SO, you have just a few options. I have had a coop in the past. and sucessfully raised chickens. I have also sucsessfully lost entire coop fulls of chickens. In just a single night. Adults, babies, roosters, ... you name it, they have been killed.

Anyway, your options.
You put them in a cage, in a coop (you cant let them just run loose, they have to be put in a small enclosure with a heat lamp), heat lamp, water, food, and protection from preditors.

or you bring them in the house, in said cage with all the periphinaila listed above. and some damn good candles. Cause chickens are nasty. and stink. And they NEVER shut up.

I have done both. I have a better survival rate in the house. But this house is so small. and I have too many kids. and I DONT want Bow to let them out. He DID let the Rabbit out more than once.

Well, its pretty cold out, and I just dont want them to freeze to death. Plus, I dont have electricity ran out there yet. I will be getting them soon, but not just yet.

The first year we moved here Amanda brought the kids some chicks for Easter one year. She fiqured I would be getting a coop soon, and I really was. I wanted one. Its just not been in the budget. well, we put them under the porch. In a cage. 2 nights went by, and the kids went out to feed them one night.

I had played a clown at the school all day and was in the shower. BR was in here in his recliner napping. Next thing I know, Brett and Matt bust through the door, screaming at me in the shower (they ran RIGHT past BR) to get my gun.

I had enough paste makeup on to choke a horse, it was running down my face, plus my hair had that spray color in it, that was running down my face, I was tired and hot and just wanted my shower. I couldnt see anything.

BR followed them in, and finally got out of them that a snake was in the cake with the chicks.

then he asked where Rayley was.
"watching the snake"

They had ran IN the house, and left a 1 1/2 year old Rayley outside with the snake.

When BR got out there she was kicking the side of the cage saying "supid nake, supid nake" (stupid snake).

He killed it, but it was too late for at least one of the bittys. after that I sent them to Amanda's and told her I would just have to wait.

Speaking of Rayley. While I was in tractor Supply today, they had their Christmas stuff on clearence. There was a board game about farm life. Well, while I was making supper she remembered it. She asked if she could go and get it. I told her it was dark. She said "I dont care, I aint scared of the dark"
I just looked at her.
she is better than the boys, but I have never sent her outside alone at night either. The boys wont even go to my room after dark, will NOT go to my bathroom, and still insist on taking a bath in THEIR bathroom, right off the living room with the door open.

So, she goes and gets on her jacket. Putting it on upside down. The waiste was up around her neck. Then her shoes and she was leaving.

She walked out the door, then came right back in and said "its dark out there"
So, I hit the door lock clicker for my truck and off she went. It turned on the interior lights.

She went out, got the game and came back in. Not scared at all. when she came back in, I tried to send one of the boys out with a bag of trash. There was NO way they would even think about it. They wouldnt even put it on the porch. I told them they should get down on their knees and bow down to her. She was more of a man then they were.

They just agree'd. and said they had no desire to die in the dark. They are such babies. LOL

so, tomorrow I have to go grocery shopping, and then, we have to work on the pen when he gets home from work. We got 7 of the big posts in the ground. and on the 7th one, the sheer pin broke in the dang auger. (can I tell you how much I LOVE an auger that runs off the tractor? its a GOD SEND)

So, BR dug that one by hand. The post hole diggers that we had to buy today (GGGRRRRR) did an 8 inch hole. So, he dug down 2 feet. It went quickly. I was suprised. So he went and got this HUGE post. They are a 6X6, 8 feet long and I swear they weigh so much I can barely pick up one end. and I toss bales of hay or sacks of feed all the time. I pick up my kids and they weigh about 60lbs. So, he is grunting and brings this thing over. (he used to BENCH press over 300 pounds, its not like he isnt strong), so, he drops it in the hole. and it just sits there.

its a 6X6. in an 8 inch hole. and it wont go in. Cause you cant fit a square peg in a round hole. He had to dig it out some more.

OH, and we were lucky, we did it on the right day. We had extra dirt. I HATE digging post holes and doing it when the moon is wrong and you end up with not enough dirt.

Dont know what I am talking about? well, if the moon is full, or maybe when its waning, (I never can remember, which is why I get excited when I have extra dirt), and you did a hole, you wont have enough dirt to fill it back up. I kid you not. Even if you put a post in that takes up most of the space where the dirt was. I am NOT kidding. Try it. take a tarp outside, Dig a hole, put all the dirt on the tarp and then try to fill it back up. You very well might have too much, or not enough. If you do it when its full, or waning, or waxing, or whichever, you will have TOO much dirt. Luckily, that is where we were today :)
We still have the 21 3inch posts to put in. and then nail up the panels. Then get feed and water troughs, and we are ready for some hogs. OH and build a lean to, cause they will need shade. They sunburn very easily.

I will be putting the chicken coop on the side of the hog pen. My goal is to be able to let them loose during the day. They can scratch around the place, and help keep the hog pen clean.

Then put them up at night. But I dont know how that will work. Darla has never seen a chicken. Duke has, but might start chasing and killing them if she is doing it.

I might have to build them a yard, fenced in and covered.

OH and I found some plans for a smoke house. made out of hydite (I know thats misspelled) blocks.

We need to get all this done. The 14th is when we start planting taters. And there is still some plowing to be done.

Oh, and here are some pics from Martha's cake.

I was disapointed in the writing. I wish I had gotten it even.. maybe next time.

Here is my drawing

and the first of 3 cakes that I am cutting and shaping

HEre it is with the crumb coat. Do you recognize it yet?
NO, its not a dress. OR a diaper. although Rayley was DETERMINED it was a diaper!

Here it is with the colors!
recognize it yet?

And me writing on it. Just to prove that I didnt pay good money for this monsterosity.

well I didnt pay good money, unless you count the icing (7 tubs.. I think, maybe more) 7 cake mixes, 6 vials of coloring paste, and a new spatula to smooth it right, (remember the baseball cake?... well, come to find out there is another way, and it involoves paper towells. ) LOL

Whoo-HOO!! after 16 hours. or was it more?? I dont know. I know it took me 2 full days to do it... anyway, after all that time, here is my FINISHED PRODUCT!

While I was uploading these photos, my great aunt called me. She needed to get her TV off the game channel. Not the game show network, the GAME channel.

I had just went over there last week. She had gotten it on input 2 somehow.

Just the next day she called me, she had done it again.

Tonight I spent over 15 minutes on the phone ( I know, cause I looked at the timer), trying to just get her to turn off the direct TV box. Now up until last week I had never even seen direct TV. I have dish, Great Aunt Etta has dish, My grandfather has dish. So, I can fix theirs. And do often. Luckily MIL got direct TV the other day and so I got to see the remote.

So, I told her hit the back button. She couldnt find it. So then I decided it was time to just turn off the satalite box. I told her to turn it off. So she keeps saying she was pushing it. Come to find out, she was pushing the off button on the TV. We went through this for 15 minutes. I never could convince her to turn off the box. Which I thought was the best thing. just start it all over. it wouldnt come back up on the game channel.

BUT SHE NEVER GOT IT! I swear, there should be an age limit on technology.

She just kept turning off the dang TV.

I even told her to sit down and do it all from the remote. No go. I could hear her creaking and groaning while getting up to hit the OTHER green button. the one on the SONY.

I am going to put lables on everything!