I quit smoking on March 22, 2011 with Electronic Cigarettes

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

overalls, dirt and red wagons....


Well, its summer- we have been enjoying it, even though its been pretty hot. When we were in South Texas my dad sent home an old red wagon that he found. and Bow immediatly latched onto it. Its now his 'agon' and he loves nothing more than for someone to pull him in it. Or he will just pull it himself.

Other than me working on the new association, BR working 6 days a week and the kids snake hunting everyday nothing new is really going on.

We have been doing alot more skeet shooting, the boys enjoy it so much, and BR is trying to get them used to the skeet coming from different directions. It doesnt take them long to master a new shot, I guess as a kid you are so adaptable to things. I cant do the ones with the skeet coming RIGHT at me, I am afraid I will get hit, but not the boys, they just raise the gun, pull the trigger and let the broken peices rain down on them!

I really dont have much to complain about, whine about or even tattle on the kids about, but I couldnt resist showing off these pictures.
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Friday, July 8, 2011

Build it and they will come----

Ugggg maybe I need to discuss God and such with Rayley a little more- 11 at night, she gets up and comes back in the living room:
"hey mom, you know when you have the holy ghost in your heart?"
"yes Rayley, please go to bed"
"well, mine keeps saying "you need to EAT- please eat, its time to eat- my Holy ghost doesnt shut up- and he likes ice cream" -------

How do you respond to that?

BR and I went away for the weekend for the first time in 10 years. We went to Kenedy to see my dad, then to San Antonio to take a course for teaching Skeet and shotgun to 4H kids.

We had a good time, But I will admit, I am NOT made to drive 450 miles a day. and I HATE traffic, and I DESPISE other drivers.

Luckily even though he just sat in the passenger seat, BR was able to work enough during the day that he was exhuasted by the time we got to San Antonio- He wore himself out changing the channel on the satalite radio and griping at me for my driving.

I love him dearly, but he is NOT a quiet or stress free passenger... He is like a rabid driving instructor.

We had a BLAST at my dads, we were only there a few hours, but got to see some friends, and sat around and laughed the ENTIRE time.

The national shooting complex was nice, we didnt get to see much, we were in class ALL day, till almost 9 that night, and then for half a day Sunday, but it was still a good time. We learned alot, and cant WAIT to get everything on track to take our kids back to state next year.

we came back on Monday, and the trip wasnt bad- well other than the driving instructions, and the hollering.

We got the kids back last night and I swear they had grown a foot- The boys said they had a good time at the banquet they worked for 4H and Rayley and Bow had a good time bouncing from one house to the other.

Today of course started off like any other- getting up, working on cakes, and the foundation. I got a great phone call during class this weekend from someone who is interested in working with us that the kids will LOVE. I am keeping it under my hat for the time being, but JYSSA will benefit from him- and I hope him from us.

Anyway, I found out that we are on the Agenda for 2 differnt board meetings to request money, and so I spent all day making sure my proposal was well rounded and correct. This is really coming together and I am getting feedback and people interested that I never realized where even there!! Everyone at the class this weekend was interested in it and more than willing to help us- and since one of our board members was able to put an article in the newspaper about us we have gotten some good publicity.

My cousin brought over some chickens he no longer wanted, and the kids took care of that, and then I spent the rest of the day trying to fiqure out how to get the door knob off the door-
My kids somehow broke the durn thing. seriously- they had us LOCKED in the house. Well, 2 of them were locked outside and wanted in, and the 2 kids who wanted outside were locked INside...

Finally I opened a window and let them crawl back and forth. And low and behold, we had a visitor. or two. My sister in law and mother in law came over. They thought I was kidding when I told them they had to crawl through the window.

We did finally jimmy the door open. And Bow promptly closed it. ALL day long I holler "SHUT THE DOOR" and noone listens... say "DONT SHUT THAT DOOR!" ONE time and they will break their neck getting it shut.

I got it open AGAIN- and a little while later sent Brett out to make sure the chickens had water- He didnt feel that was the right job for him, got mad and ... YOU guessed it- slammed the door- locking us in AGAIN. I didnt bother to re jimmy it open until I saw BR coming up the driveway. Finally we got the knob out of the door- it was NOT easy. I tried for over an hour. and I get to take it back tomorrow. I swear that thing is less than 6 months old!!

I just honestly, dont quite understand how this happens... seriously.. I swear my life is like a country song.. I never did work on the two cakes I have due- and Lord KNOWS I gotta get them done- but there was just NOT enough hours today...

But its all good- I have got everyone asleep and am finishing off a gallon of Blue Bell Happy Tracks ice cream.... Life is goooood...

When the going gets tough- Shut up and work harder !!

~ Troy Landry

Thats my new motto :)

Tonight we were sitting here watching swamp people and Bow starts saying "..... IF YOU CALL ME ELIZABETH ONE more time!" I was thinking if that's the worst thing he quotes off swamp people we will have it made. LOL

We have been busy these last few weeks.
The wedding was a success! Rayley did great, and looked adorable!

I was very proud of her.

And we had another surprising twist... Matt asked if he could weedeat. Seriously. So BR taught him how. Unfortunately, he got about half way done and the weedeater messed up. I had to take it to the shop and have gas lines changed. *again, THANK YOU to the federal government and the EPA for putting ethanol in the gas- it raised corn prices AND is eating all the parts used in engines..... *

But, the biggest thing around here was:
BR and I have always felt that although our shooting sports was a wonderful thing, we needed more- We needed an actual skeet range, a trap thingy, and an archery range- (we lost ours last year that we borrowed), plus a a rifle range and classroom, and all the other elements that combined make for a great time. Something that belonged TO the kids. Not just a borrowed gym that we had to restore all our stuff every night, or a hay field with a skeet machine on a trailer.

We have helped a little through the years, doing whatever was asked of us always helped with the fundraisers and worked hard to get more money for the club, and have got ourselves signed up to go to San Antonio next week to take some instructor courses. Eventually we talked about it enough between ourselves that we decided it was time to talk to everyone else. So we did. And everyone else felt the same way!!

So, the next logical thing was to look into buying some land and getting the fundraisers started to pay for it and build the complex. Then we found out the 4H couldn't own land.
So, we decided to start a non profit foundation, named it the Jasper Youth Shooting Sports Association, and got to work. We put together an awesome board; Parents, civic leaders, business owners, elected officials, and everyone in between, even me.

We had our first meeting a week ago tonight- and I swear, I don't think I have ever been that excited- I was supposed to let BR run the meeting, he is the chairman after all, but honestly, I was just so gung ho I couldn't stop. We presented the bylaws, mission statement, general ideas, job descriptions, and even a plot of land to buy. Everyone loved it. - I had worked on it for weeks getting it together, and once everyone got on the same page, we came home and I got busy again.
I have read more about non profits, and 501 (c)'s than I ever knew was possible, am learning to form a corporation, reading tax law, and insurance policies. By the time we left, we had voted to not only acquire the land offered to us, BUT, on our first fundraiser and had raised almost 300.00 from the very room that comprised the board!

The land is PERFECT. its half cleared, half still in woods, is way in the country, has a creek running through it AND is surrounded by hunting land where we can take the 4H kids hunting!!

BR was off all weekend, and ended up telling me "ya know, I took off all weekend, you could do the same" . BUT, we would end up talking about the association anyway.

The worst thing was- Monday was a holiday and I couldn't conduct ANY business!! So, I opened a PO box online, and STILL had to wait until Tuesday to get the number.

I spoke to some other people who had started complexes and couldn't wait to meet with them to see their facilities. Of course, my days were still full of trying to figure out the 501(c) and trying to decide between a corporation and an LLC.

I still haven't figured that part out yet.

We are just so blessed to have a board of 20 people who are as excited about this as we are. People who are willing to work hard, put their necks and reputations on the line, and MAKE something- Not just a bunch of folks with ideas, and talking about it, But people willing to knock on doors, write letters, learn rules and read legal papers.

BR has been such a great help too. He calls me all the time with a new idea, something else to research, encouraging words, or just to add to the dream. Not to mention; he hasn't complained once when I worked strait through till 7pm and forgot to cook him supper, or wouldn't talk about anything except form 1023, EIN's, grant proposals or fiscal sponsorships. He wants this as much as I do, and we KNOW that time is of the essence. Brett is already 12- we want him to be able to compete on a state level for a few years. Its not fair for him to watch all this happen and only Bow get to benefit from it.

I'd like to see at least one 5 man stand, 1 complete skeet set up, and 1 trap setup in place before this time next year.

Anyway, yesterday BR and I, and 2 others from the board went to the closest gun club to us to learn about some of the ins and outs. We came away from it with alot of valuable information, but more than that with a sense of pride and knowhow. we CAN do this.
Unfortunatly, we also came away from it with some information that we didnt want to hear. The words "gross negligence" and "liability insurance" are never fun to hear. But its something you have to always have in the back of your mind anytime you allow the public onto a site that you design and construct, especially for the youth to use.

And more especially when there are firearms and archery equiptment involoved. ( I am not allowed to call them 'weapons' around the 4H kids- which makes no sense to me, a weapon is only a bad thing if you use it for a bad purpose. I really have no easy term to use. "instrument for expelling projectiles" seems too long and cumbersome. )
anyway, the concept of liability is something that does scare me. I can ensure safety in the way our kids USE the Instruments for expelling projectiles or IFEP's, and I can make sure that they are maintained. But you cant inspect every shell that comes through, arrows are known to break from a hairline fracture, wood and synthetic are not made to last forever, and strings get frayed and can snap; mechanical failure on a brand new item is a very distinct posibility. And here was a man who had done this for decades, who was on the state boards, wasnt just an instructor for KIDS, but an instructor FOR instructors, telling us " you DONT want to be the ones supplying weapons to kids- PERIOD. you CANT afford the liability"
He said no insurance company would touch us with a 10 ft pole, the kids MUST supply their OWN IFEP's and Projectiles. UGGGGGG
the WHOLE point of our entire club is its FREE. The parents and kids work our tails off all year to raise money for all the IFEP's and Projectiles and targets (I wonder if I can still use the word target.... to have a target you need something to aim AT the target, and that is traditionally a weapon.....)- anyway, we work hard to make sure that anyone with a finger and a shoulder can shoot a gun. You dont have to have your own, you dont even have to know which end is the bad end when you show up. We are trained to teach you every bit of that. We provide ear plugs, glasses, skeet, heck, we even provide the water to drink! All we ask of the parents is "Bring them, and watch" If a parent WANTS to help- we LOVE it. if they dont, we are okay with that.

But, now that part of the dream, the one for all the disadvantaged kids who dont already HAVE a shotgun or bow at home might not work out for us. Thats the kids we wanted to be sure got to hunt, and were able to shoot to their hearts content. Its heartbreaking. But, Its NOT going to stop us. PERIOD. One dog doesnt stop the show. We can fiqure out ways to get around that. But, now we have to break it to everyone IN the club. And sad thing is, folks think I am being the bad guy.
It doesnt matter though- we WILL prevail, we WILL still have that range by this time next year, and we WILL work to make sure anyone interested is able to shoot in all the disaplines we offer. It might just be a little differnt than we imagined.

The actual association is fine, its not affected by this. Its just an entity to facilitate the act of expelling projectiles (shooting seems just as unPC as weapons and targets....)- it will simply be like any other gun range in the state- and allow the 4H to utilize the facilities.
Its the Club that worries me. Oh not that we wont still have one. Most of our kids have their own IFEPs, so thats not the issue. And this is East Texas- most folks know someone, who knows someone, who has a cache of guns. Its the strife it might cause amoung the adults that is bothering me.

But alas- that's neither here nor there, the point is- we HAVE an association- We WILL have an entire shooting complex, and we are going to have it SOON!!

I am just thrilled to be a part of something so great- And the other night, I went to the NWTF chapter meeting to discuss our banquet, and our field representative has his own 4H gun range too! Its way up in North Texas, but its great to know someone else has done this.

And I know we have a great board, I didn't have a single person hear about it that didnt want to be a part of it immediately!!

The boys have been picking peas all week, getting up and getting in the fields right after daylight because its so hot, and then picking a few bushels and selling them. And the other day we sold 4 hogs, after I took out the money for feed, the boys got the rest for feeding and watering them.
I am hoping this will teach them that hard work DOES pay off. And if it doesn't pay off, maybe it will teach them to get a good job and pay others to do the dirty work.

I will close with a video of Bow,

Thursday, June 23, 2011

the first days of summer-

Its still HOT and DRY- we have had wildfires all around us- pretty scary stuff- Luckily God saw fit to send down some rain, and what the Volunteer fire depts hadnt already put out, was put out by His rain.

well the first day of summer arrived and Rayley turned 7- OMG- what happened to my teeny little mini monster that weighed 4 pounds 13 oz at birth and had to wear cabbage patch kid clothes?? I cant belive how grown up she is.
and yes it sucks to be the kid of a custom cake baker- LOL she got a Big Red icebox cake with cool whip frosting. But it was homemade!

For her birthday she got lots of stuff- but her favorite BY FAR, was her pocket knife her dad gave her- its pink of course- and she hasnt been without it since.

The day she got it, the boys were putting together a dog pen- it said "put together in under an hour" on the package- They underestimated the ability of my children to not be capable of contstucting a box with wire on it.

SO, They were opening the box, and Hoover says "we need a pocket knife" He doesnt have his, and Brett doesnt have his, well Bertha Sue reaches in her pocket and says "here, you can use mine- but dont loose it"

She has slept with it curled in her hand every night since her party.

My dad came in- He and I went to get him a gun like mine, and low and behold, there was a pink one- so he bought that for me and took my black and silver one. I am SOOO thrilled!! I love it!

Our house has been pretty hot here lately, by afternoon its hitting 80 with the AC running full blast. So, we decided it needed new ducts- I went to Lowes and bought the duct, and some tape and came home- first of all, I HATE wallerin around in the dirt- second, there are LOTS of spiders and other bugs under my house, third, I REALLY hate it when my skin cries.

BUT we got it done- Me and Bertha Sue- BRett helped a little, but she was right beside me the entire time-
One time I lost my knife and she said "here, use mine" - yep, she DOES come in handy-
Then she said "I better not break a nail or someone is gonna pay for this" ahhhhh my little princess. It was kinda funny to see four hands with pink american tips covered in dirt and grime taping and cutting on the duct work. or at least thats what Brett pointed out- He said "y'all are too girly to be down here doin this-" I told him he was right, and offered to let him do it- he said "NO, his point was we needed to quit being so fru-fru....

I let her get some artificial nails for her birthday, she is going to be a in a wedding on Saturday, so she got her hair redyed and got tips. She is THRILLED!

The airduct fix actually did what it was supposed to for the most part- But alas my house being cool just wasnt meant to be.....

Right now, its 7am and 84* in my house- see yesterday the fan on the outside condenser unit stopped working- the motor somehow burned up- I am QUITE sure it has NOTHING to do with that string wrapped around the shaft- and I KNOW my kids didnt see a fan blade spinning real fast and decide to see if it could cut a string in half- I know they wouldnt do that sort of thing...

BUT that means I have to replace that fan- I am trying to decide if I should tackle it or wait till BR gets home and let him do it. But I dont think we can wait that long- the coolest it got here last night was about 82*- It was SOO hard to sleep- For everyone except the boys- they slept on the porch- it was in the 70's out there and they slept like babies.

Of course that isnt all they broke yesterday- somehow, they managed to bust up the entire filter part of my dryer- not just the lint trap, but the peice that HOLDS the lint trap- The dryer quit working, so I took it apart, yep come to find out, there was a sock stuck in the fan motor- I have to buy all the pieces for that today too-

What is it with me and fans here lately? I think the fan clutch on my truck is going out too!!

Last week we had vacation bible school- I worked it except the night BR was off- The first rattle out of the box I walk through and there sits BRett and another boy on a pew in the foyer-
Come to find out, the other kid, well known for starting crap, had pushed him - so Brett rared back to 'take care of the problem' and got caught-

They were sitting out of one of the activities- BUT, I decided that was just too much- So, I loaded him up and brought him home, then went back to finish out my night- EVERYONE up there asked where he was- they all offered to let him help them, SO- I brought him back the next night and he was a helper from then on out.

It would have been different if this child hadnt been in an altercation with EVERY other boy in the church- Literly. And my kids take the old adage "if you dont stand for something, you'll fall for anything" to heart-

Bow really enjoyed himself- and loved the crafts- Bertha Sue had a blast and Hoover was plain old Hoover-

On the second night though we had a slight... 'come to Jesus' meeting- I told the kids "load up" its time to go- I was hot, tired and needed some nicotine-
well, BErtha Sue was on the playground and just kept playing- I told her about 5 times. I even got caught up talking to someone and ended up staying longer, she NEVER came to the truck- The other boys all loaded up- but no Bertha Sue- So, I started backing up, she kept playing-
So, I started to drive off- She kept playing.

I drove out of the driveway and down the road about 25 feet till I was hid in some trees. I called the church to tell a friend of mine who was finishing up cleaning that I was going to drive around the back way and hide behind the church- to leave her. But she said "I'll bring her home, just keep going" - So I did.

When that child got home she sat on the porch for over an hour- she was mad as a wet hen. And a little scared.

Finally her daddy went out and got her- she kept saying " I was just pickin" I told her " I was too, the first time, and the second time" But I didnt say a word after that- I just told her that she was lucky someone was willing to bring her home, it was a long walk in the dark- (we live almost a mile away) -

well, on the last night, when it was time to leave I told them all, and started rounding them up- Put Bow in the truck, saw Hoover lurking around thinking he was being slick, and KNEW Brett had heard my "byerly's load up" call. well, I knew Rayley was in the church helping clean up- So, I went to get my truck, to back it up to the front door, and when I started it up and started backing up low and behold I see Brett and Matt running from different directions hollering "DONT LEAVE US!! we are coming!!!" and 3 people ran inside to tell Rayley I was leaving her again- She knew though that I was just moving the truck, she had asked my permission to help clean up, but noone else knew that.

Not sure how long it will last- they have the memory retention of a housefly, but it was funny as hell to watch that night!

Everyone was laughing about the fact that I left her- and I said "yeah- and it might have been better if everyone here didnt know EXACTLY where I live!"

And for those that are freaking out- Dont- *rolls eyes*- There were plenty of adults who I trust, all around and they KNEW what I was doing- Half of them wish they had thought to do something like that with their own kids.

Now, I am off here to go to town and get the parts for my dryer AND my AC- then its back home to work on the non profit foundation that BR and I started to build a shooting complex here in our town, and I have to alter the dress that Princess Whinesalot is wearing in the wedding- OH and fix a few of the nails she has busted off...

Sunday, June 5, 2011

summer is here- where is the AC??

Whew its HOT- and DRY

Last week was pretty normal or at least normal for around here-
My Sister and Brother in Law took the kids to the lake last weekend to swim. And Brett decided to fish-

Not a bad fish- He wanted to have it mounted-

Luke did say that Bow was about as heardheaded as they come- I agreed. Come to find out- he asked for a hotdog. So, they all got out of the water and got hotdogs and chips, Bow ate his chips and Luke wouldn't let him go back to the water until he ate the hotdog. So, it became a contest of wills. Luke won.

Later Bow told me he wanted to take Petey to the lake next time- I asked why-
"so he can bite uncle 'ukes fingers off when he gets mean"

The boys had an Archery Tournament this weekend about 5 hours away and there as a fishing tournament that our 4-H club was supposed to work- SO- I ended up working it with Rayley, while the boys went with some of our other adult leaders to the tournament.

It was HOT at the lake- To the point of feeling the much needed moisture leaving your body and drying instantly in the heat. There was no such thing as 'cooling' off. Well, Until Rayley and a few of the other 4-H kids that were working found the perfect place to get out of work AND heat. They went to the Lake to 'get their feet wet'...

I said "fine, but DONT get your capri's wet" So- about 45 minutes later, one of the boys comes up to us and says "Look~!" it was the biggest muscle we had ever seen. His mom asked "where did you get that?"
"the girl with the pink hair found it"

Ahhhhh yep- that would be my daughter- SO- I went down to take her picture with it, and her pants are SOAKING wet.

I really didnt care- it was hot.

But truthfully, I figured without the boys I wouldn't have to deal with any critters. NOPE- I was wrong- we had to break it open to see if there was a pearl inside.

there wasn't. but it was still pretty-

After she played down there another hour or two she came back up to where we were working and was SOAKING wet. from head to toe- So I had to run her home to change clothes.

Then we went back for the dinner and auction- I was serving the food, and the 4-H kids were showing off the items for auction. It was a great night, and they raise alot of money for different organizations- us, CASA, little league and a few others I think.

The boys did pretty good- they sent me updates through out the day-

Hoover scored a 188 out of 360 and Brett a 146. I don't think that's bad for their first time out- and more importantly, they only lost ONE arrow... ONE. That's pretty good - considering they were shooting at lifesize targets, from a small javalina to a large deer, and only one arrow got away- Heck, here I have seen them shooting at a 2X2 foam block and miss it and we NEVER find the arrow...

Today I am wore out- I was in the sun from about 9am till it went down yesterday- then for a few more hours. And amazingly enough- I have the most awful headcold. its killing me! yesterday alone I took about 8 benadryls, in about 6 hours. And honestly, this heat just makes it worse. Its so hot and humid you cant take a deep breath.

This morning after about 5 hours of sleep I got up and stumbled to the coffee pot, then stumbled to my medicine cabinet. Took down two pills and swallowed them. right about cup of coffee number two, I realized I had taken nyquil instead of dayquil. So I quickly drank the rest of that coffee, and the rest of the pot and then made another pot.

Somehow, amidst all the trips to the bathroom, I still fell asleep. Only to wake to the phone ringing-

My grandmother in law wanted to buy a new AC unit today- and my Mother in law wanted me to install it. Oh and drive to get it. I asked what time? She said "oh around 10ish is good" - Okay- no problem. TILL I hung up and realized it was 9:16- It had been almost 8 when I fell asleep I guess-

Now, in her defense, noone expects me to be sleeping at nine- I am usually up and dressed well before.

So I got Rayley up, she was up with me till after midnight, and told her to get dressed- Bow was still with my mother in law, who had SOOOO graciously offered to keep him the night before-

Now Princess Whinesalot is indecisive and bitchy on GOOD days, on days when she is tired, sunburned and just plain wore out- she is MISERABLE.

But we finally got ready and left- Picked up my mother in law and Bow, who has lost his boots- a solid week since we saw them. I have NO clue where they could be- but they are GONE, and we headed to town.

Have I mentioned how HOT it is?

Well, putting in an Air conditioner in a house that one is not working in- is TWICE as hot. Cause you are already NOT getting cool air, and then your WORKING on top of being HOT. I don't like it when my skin cries. at all. And its been crying ALOT here lately.

See, in my world, when something leaks, its not good. water trough leaking? gotta plunk down 100.00 or two on a new one.

water faucets leaking? the bill is gonna be 80.00 higher AND you get to plumb.

Soda leaking? your gonna get sticky.

gas tank leaking? fire is immanent.
and you are wasting liquid gold.

you get my drift.
So, when my skin leaks I take this as a VERY bad sign. VERY bad. I hate to see anything cry- but especially my skin.

I am not attractive with a 'glow'- I am red, and sticky and cranky.

So, basically, I just HATE to sweat. PERIOD. BR says he is gonna bottle it- cause its sure to cure cancer as rare as it is...

I have heard its good for you- well, I have also heard housework wont kill you- Honestly, I'd rather not take the chance on either one if noone minds.

SO anyway- Off to Lowes we go- where by the way, they have a ban on ecigarettes. They wont even let their employees vape on break out of eyesight of customers- Luckily I am not an employee.....

Anyway- into Lowes I go- armed with the sizes of the window and the room- and there I am met with a selection of a whole whopping 7 units.
I can get the 89.99 one that will cool off a closet- if its already 70. and the fancy smchmancy one that promises to cool in winter and warm in summer, or something like that and costs 800.00.

I decided to cut it in half. Just normal, nice middle of the road ac unit.

I think I done good. Now, just on a side note- do you know what a medium to large window unit weighs? like poundage wise? you would think, since they sit so precariously on that little window ledge that they were not that heavy.... you are indeed incorrect. Not only are they heavy, they are not balanced.

SO, I pick up this thing that I swear weighs at least as much as me- and put it on the cart. cause, I am at Lowes- the only one they have in stock in the size I want is on the FLOOR, under 3 others- AND The only time I got asked if I needed help was when I was buying a phillips screwdriver... seriously.

10 people walk by two women looking at boxes as big as a small car, saying "should we get this one? or this one?" and just walk faster- I am fighting with a peg wall that will not let the last package of disposable screwdrivers loose and I have 2 men walk by and say "can I help you with something?"...

Uhhh NOPE- I got this.

So, we pay, and then push or rather pull this elephant in a box out to the truck. you know, my pretty white dually, 4X4... the one that is fairly tall?? yeah- that one. RIGHT after we get it thrown in the back, a guy drives by and hollers out the window "y'all were just too quick for me! I was gonna help you!" -

You couldnt honk? or holler?

Now, dont get me wrong, we werent struggiling- we didnt look like two squirells pushing a coconut up a tree or anything, so maybe the casual observer wouldnt know it was slightly heavy.

SO, we arrive at my grandmother in laws. I get the box, pick it up (luckly its at chest height now) and go up her 5 steps, and through two doors- Her hollering at me- "CHELLE- LET ME HELP YOU!!" Naw- no broken hips today please- :)

I get it inside, and get to take OUT the other unit- this one was put in by a man. who actually used EVERY screw that came in the box and safety harness to install the dang thing. there was NO pushing it out the window. I had to take out 8 screws and break off 3. what man uses all the screws that come in a package? Seriously.... And I KNOW he had to read the directions to figure out where they all went... which again seems quite odd..

So, I tossed the old unit out the window, and wrassled the new one in. and to be honest, even if they could have helped me, its not a two person job. its just almost too big for one person. It wasnt as quick as all that- it was a slight fight- I mean there were SCREWS all in it, but within 30 minutes it was gone and I was installing the new one. Anyway- I got it all set in there, put in the screws, and Voila- Cool air is SOOOOO nice!!!

looking back, it wasnt so heavy- and it really wasnt a hard job by any means- its just tooo dang hot to be doing ANYTHING- Especially after you stayed out all night-

But now my boys are home, Bow is back and Rayley has others to bitch at- AND about- So- I am fixing to cook supper in anticipation of BR getting off work and enjoy my recliner.

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Bow's mind at work

BR and I were talking to Bow the other night- He was carrying on a pretty mature conversation- and honestly, he tickles us to death. and I was asking him all kinds of questions.

Well, I asked him "are you an idiot?"
SO, BR asked him "do you know what an idiot is?"
"A" (this is yes to him... I dont know why,...)
"whats an idiot?"
"BRETT" he says- plain as day and with undying confidence.
"But what does the word 'idiot' mean?" BR asked again
"It means BOYS" he said.


Later we were in the bedroom and he loves to point out the letters in the brands that are burned into my bed and dresser and such- its old barn wood with old brands burned into it.

He has decided that 'B' is the best letter- cause its in two of his names.

So, he found the rocking B brand, and pointed it out- Then said "there is no "w" written on your bed"

Absentmindedly I said "oh Iam sure there is- but even if there isnt its okay- you know what a W is."

ABout 5 minutes later he said "Me dots an idea" "its a dood un"

I said "an idea? - about what?"
"the duba U's not on you bed"
"ahhhhh- okay- "
"wanna hear it?"
uhhh I guess.. "sure baby, what is your good idea?"
"we take you knife, taus daddy dint div me un yet, and we tarve duba U's in you bed~!! Den, we tan take a wighter dat you uset to use, and burn the tarving"


"pease? you needs some duba Us!! I tant spell B O duba U wif out dem."

"NO! maybe we can talk daddy into making us a W brand and we can brand your letters into the bed somewhere"

"otay- but dat mite take a while- him dont know how to make a brand- dis would be quicker"

UGGGGGGG Luckily I did look up and see a W on my dresser- SO, I sent him over there to find it- He did. and was thrilled- Now I just hope he doesnt start looking for the o......

And today- he has fiqured out that he can send just about anything out of his cross bow as a projectile.

For Christmas he got a toy crossbow and some sticky arrows that came with it. Well, he has since lost the arrows- occasionally he will find one and shoot it for a few hours, but eventually he will loose it again, or the big kids will take it all away from him and loose it.

So, Today he found out he could shoot a pencil out of it. that was innocent enough- it looked like an arrow he said- THen it was on to crayons. he would run around saying "I ooting a cayon at you!" I made him stop.

occasionally he will find something that wont shoot out of there- and you will hear him holler "nope! dont ork!! 'et me ind umfin else'

THEN, he put a cheeseball in there, and it flew across the room like a scalded cat. This entertained the kids so much that it took every ounce of willpower I had to restore calm and order to the house again.

I just had to take the entire appuratas away from him when he found a double A battery fit in the groove PERFECTLY and was fixing to launch it at his sisters head.

Monday, May 23, 2011

whats up with the stupid questions

My question of the day:

Posed by Brett- "why dont we get an allowence?"

My answer "Because this is a household, not a welfare state- here you have to contribute to exist and we exist to contribute, if you would LIKE to earn money, then I will be happy to give you a job that is above and beyond your chores- the things we all do to sustain life in our home- something that will take responsibility off of me. THAT is how you get money- by EARNING it. "

Now, I am not trying to start a debate or discussion on if a kid should be handed an allowence or earn it, if they should do chores above and beyond their current chores to get money or if they shouldnt have chores at all- I am just stating what happens in MY house. and more than likely why my children hate me compared to the 'cool parents' of their friends.

Just like this skeet shoot my boys are going on- Its a 20.00 entry fee. I know their chances of getting in trouble and not getting to go is pretty high- And I know they wont work as hard to do well if I pay for it.

SO, I made THEM give the their entry fee- I will in turn give them each their entry fee BACK when they leave here, AND 10.00 in spending money, IF they do get to go, AND they practice every day before they leave. IF they wish to take MORE than 10.00- they will need to earn it.

Now, my boys, being the kids they are really think I will not remember this deal,
But, they are sorely mistaken. I will NOT give them back their 20.00 if they dont practice, and will not reimburse them if they get grounded and are not able to go.

So far, this method just makes me the bad guy and mean and hateful and makes them want to move out and never see me again- BUT- maybe it will teach them life lessons, so when they DO move out, they will pay their own way and not come to me constantly or worse, the goverment.
And if it doesnt, at least I was able to get a little work out of them while they lived here.

Today has been an excersize is extending my patience- Brett is doing pursuasive writing. The child who refused to eat pizza for years because he thought it would make it too easy on me has decided he cant write in favor or opposition of something.

This child would argue with a fencepost and knock if over when he found out it was right- but cant come up with a single opinion as to why someone would want to live in the country instead of the city. PUULLLEEASSEEE

He argues with everyone, about everything, and never shuts up- yet he cant come up with a cohensive paragraph about why he wouldnt want to live in Colonial America.
This child is a TRUE Byerly. He isnt truely happy unless he is pissed about something.
At times his happyness seems to stem from the misery that he can inflict on others.

And Rayley just actually asked me "what do they mean by 'circle the correct answer'? "


Today, I said "lets get started on school-" and while I was cleaning the living room, kitchen, and doing laundry Matt is walking around picking up- folding blankets, picking up trash- THings they will not do if I hold a hot iron to their feet. THEN, I was sitting helping Brett and heard dishes being washed- Matt was in there washing them. I hadnt given them a single chore- he just didnt want to do schoolwork THAT badly!

And Brett decided to argue with me that I was wrong to cross out his answer and tell him to redo it.
The problem:
there are 4 people in line behind you, 7 people in front of you- how many people are in line? (the answer is NOT 11)

well he wrote 11 anyway- THIS is what I deal with on a daily basis- look at the rules, and then break them. because obviously they DONT apply to YOU. Right?

well this was 30 minutes of me telling him "think about it" "use crayons and draw a picture" "use common sense Brett" "no the book is NOT wrong, YOU are" "draw lines on a peice of paper and COUNT them" He still just said "well I will write 12 because you OBVIOUSLY think its the correct answer adn thats the ONLY way you will let me move on to the next page"

Like its my fault he doesnt read directions- or comprehend them. OR accept when he is WRONG- OMG- BUT he wont write an argument for or against planes and cars.

Matt has been slightly quiet today- THANK GOD- He has been doing geometry. which he loves, But he gets sooooo distracted- ≅ had him lost as a goose for quite a while. when I excplained what cungruent was he said "so they could just use an = sign and be done with it?"

"YEP" "but its math- they try to make it AS complicated as they can." LOL

Wait till I start trying to teach him Algebra- I cant imagine how fun that will be-

So far today they have induced a miagraine AND a feverblister- I cant wait for tomorrow!!

Saturday, May 21, 2011

May 21- the end of the world, or just another day-

Today I went to a funeral for a baby girl- Faith Renee Hancock- the newborn daughter of Todd and Tonya. I cant express how sad I am for them and their families. As I was driving to the funeral, in my pretty pink and green and yellow flowered dress, because they asked us to wear spring colors, I saw people all around, on their horses riding, on their lawnmowers, at the farmers market, getting gas in their 4wheelers or boats, or at a car show in down town Jasper, with a bouncy house and festive atmosphere- and I couldnt help but be mad at everyone- for going about their day and their lives, while quite a few of the people of this town were going to a cemetary to lay a baby to rest- the hardest thing a family can do- We were going to witness it, we were going to share it in, and these people were just going about their lives like nothing had happened.
I was SO mad at them. And I was jealous- A beautiful spring day, and I was going to witness every parents worst nightmare. Be a part of every grandparents worst day. And they were enjoying life, or going about their mundane chores like someone's world wasnt ending.

And then I realized, we all do it- every second of every day- there is someone with their greatest triumph and someone suffering their greatest loss- while we are whooping and hollering and having a blast, someone else is sad and lonely and desperate for the hurt to go away. So, try to remember that- sometimes the lady in walmart who runs out in front of you with her buggy isnt doing it to be rude or disrespectful, she is just thinking back to watching all those pretty pink balloons lift off from a sad muddy graveyard and float to the heavens with a prayer for a baby who never felt the sunshine.

The service was beautiful, heartwrenching and touching. I pray I never have to watch another man carry his baby's casket into a crowd of people to be put into the ground- But I also pray that I get to witness the love and empathy that I saw today for the rest of my life.
What these parents did for us, their friends and family, to allow us into their most sacred and heartbreaking time is beyond words. I will never be able to repay them for teaching me the true meaning of life, love , and Faith- for sharing their joys and heartbreak with us, through pictures, blog posts and facebook-

Now, as a Christian I dont believe today is the end of the world- But, if it is- I know I saw the purest love today that there ever has been. Love that is born the second parents realize a million in one chance has happened, there is a life growing, for them to nurture and love- THAT is pure love- to love something that isnt even here yet- to anticipate it, to long for it. And true grief is to have it taken from you before you can enjoy it.

That being said- Is it supposed to be at 5pm central or eastern that the world ends? cause its already 3 here and I got alot to do and need to know if I only have another hour.....

In true Byerly fashion, my kids enjoyed last night- just incase the end IS coming-

See, we are the type of family that really does try to stay quiet, and keep to ourselves, and we work hard at not causing drama- or excitement- BUT, it seems to find us- no matter what- Just a simple BBQ? let my kids come over- one will fall in your swimming pool and try to walk on the bottom.
Having a nice family reunion? some kid will make fun of one of my kids and then someone ends up with a bloody nose and whining about 'that mean byerly boy'.. We just attract situations- most of the time, NOT even of our own making. We are just in the right place, at the right time, and BOOM- we are a headline- AGAIN.

My sister in law came and got them and took them to her moms pool hall- its in a tiny little town north of here- Before they left I made them put on decent clothes, and told them "DONT be rude, please be good, and DONT insult anyone- alot of my clients are from Pineland, and they ALL know you are my kids- even if YOU dont know them!"

I didnt mention anything about enticeing K9 units or being involoved in a manhunt-

I have GOT to learn that I need to quit telling them what NOT to do, and only tell them what they CAN do- (its the buzzard catching thing ALL over again- )

so anyway- as I hear the story, this is what happened. They were all playing pool, when my sister in law gets a phone call from her daughter- she is dog sitting the K9 for the police department- at the policemans house.

my neice needs a lighter... to light a candle.. well sister in law, being the astute person she is, knows this is bunk- BUT, heads over there anyway- well it WAS bunk- Come to find out- the policemans house sits on an airstrip- and planes DO use it. well, As my neice is in the house, some guy from out of state, lands his plane and then walks in and closes the door- like he owns the place- the Dog went on full alert, and the man left. BUT- and this is where my kids become involved-- When my sister in law gets there, with my so far, well behaved children in tow, the resident police officer comes screaching in on two wheels, with a few on duty buddies. (my kids got so excited at this point of the story that I pretty much had to get the rest from my sister in law) - I heard 'dust flying everywhere' 'two wheels' , 'like on TV' etc etc....

SO- then they go to looking for said pilot- the one who has NO clue where he is- and proceed to arrest him- well in the meantime, my kids are enjoying the crap out of this- I mean they are in the MIDDLE of a man hunt- guns drawn, full police mode- (or at least thats what they remember in their heads)-
THEN, my neice brings out the K9 dog- and proceeded to tell my intellegent but commonsense lacking boys that he only attacks when commanded by words in German.

Which leads them to attempt to say every 'germanish' word they can think of- "Schnitzel"
(they dont know many german words...)

All my Sister in law could think of was "OMG- what if his attack word IS "Schinitzel"?

Luckily for them, it wasnt- and soon law and order was restored to the sleepy little town of Pineland, but forever will it be remembered that was the day that the Byerly boys came to town. EVEN if they were not directly involoved!

Now, I also have to tell off on Bow- A friend of ours came over to pick something up- this is the guy who has the distinct privledge of picking up all of my dead animals and taking them to his wife who is a taxidermist- the day he had a dozen frozen rabbits all over the bed of his truck because the bag busted is PRICELESS- and he was on the porch and we were shooting the breeze when the kids dumped out some grub worms- He asked Bow if he had ever eaten one. Bow just looked at him with the 'hmmmmm- I cant remember if I am supposed to admit to that or not' look...

So then, Brett asks "have you ever ate a BBQ'd grasshopper? "
and Tom Says "no, but I've had chocolate covered Grasshoppers"
and Bow says "I eat chocolate covered Bunnies!" I guess he thinks his easter bunnies are the real thing- dipped in chocolate- which brings me to my next point- I need to make sure there is NEVER any dipping chocolate around here- as we still have a few live bunnies at the barn....

********** breaking news*********
Just overheard in my kitchen-
my nephew who is 8 is over here with Rayley and Bow, they are playing- They just came in and asked if they could have a sandwhich- I said "yes"
So, they went into the kitchen, and I hear the normal sounds- Getting of the bread, jelly, peanut butter, and setting it on the counter-
Then Masen says " So where are the sandwhiches?"
Rayley said "uhhh we have to make them"
"OH" he said-

Then, he says "so uhhhhhh where is the package they are in?" Rayley said "well there is the bread, the peanut butter and the jelly, we have to assemble it"


5 minutes later he says "ya know, I have never made my own sandwhich before" So to his future wife- dont let him fool ya, his aunt Michelle made him learn how- once upon a time.....

20 minutes ago they were outside playing- and in came Bow, he had a 'needle' in his 'inger'

I knew imediatly he had a cactus thorn in his thumb- Behind him came in Rayley and Masen.

Now, we dont just have cactus growing all over- BRett has a cactus garden. With maybe 3 cacti in it.
I asked "so why did you idiots get in the cactus?"
They all looked at me like a deer in the headlights- to which Masen replied "I DIDNT" all proud of hisself-

"I am not stupid, I know this is a cactus thorn, and I know it didnt jump off and attack you, so WHY did you touch it?"

Bertha Sue- in her infinate wisdom and beleif that a good excuse will always get someone ELSE in trouble says "well Masen dared us to"
uhhhhh okay-
SO, me, being me, said "well aint that just the brightest thing you have ever done?"
"well when someone dares you to do something you HAVE to do it, its the law!"
"well in that case, I DARE you to clean up the trash in the yard and double dog dare you to clean your room"
all this time I am sticking tape to Bows thumb trying to get this miniscule hairlike thorn out, while he screams-

"not funny MOOOOM" and to Masen " you butthead, your an idiot"
"well Rayley, he cant be both and let me explain the differnce to you between an idiot and an ass- see, an ass is gonna see just how much of an idiot you are- and in this case the ass won.
who is standing here begging for tape? saying they have thorns in their hands?
Right- YOU and Bow-
whats Masen standing there doing? -

Laughing at you for being an idiot.
You KNEW there were thorns, you KNEW they hurt, and yet, you were dumb enough to stick your hand in them. "

Now Masen did want to be insulted that I called him an ass- but I also explained to him that he KNEW better than to touch them, and no matter how dumb some people are, when you take advantage of that, you are indeed an ass.

Nothing to be mad about- its just kids being kids- and hopefully, kids that have learned a life lesson, again, at the hands of mother nature- and thanks to my lackluster parenting skills-

If not, Scotch tape is a good thorn puller-

Now its 4pm my time, and I either have an hour to get my toe nails painted so I dont go into the afterlife with chipped nails and am driven nuts for eternity, OR the world ISNT going to end, and I have to cook BR's supper- either way- I have work to do-

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Logic doesnt work with MY kids......

Well, I reread my 'love and logic' book- I am TRYING to raise happy healthy kids, without the aid of pharmasutical enhancements.

It seems sooo easy in a book- but resisting the urge to reach out and touch someone, especially when they feel the need to be a smartmouthed brat is very hard.

Yesterday I started off by giving them each a plastic sheet for their beds.

"whats this?"
"read the package"
"But we dont wet the bed"
"this is not for your bed wetting, its for mine"
"from here on out, I will walk in and wake you once, I will then holler from the door to wake you a second time, the third time will be a pitcher full of water dumped on your head- and then you will be responsible for remaking your bed"
"But thats not fair!"
"your mean"
"GAWD I wish I could move out"
"awwww, I knew y'all would understand, thank you, I cant wait to start this new chapter in our lives!- Now, go make your beds, be sure to use 2 sheets and a blanket"

Basicly I am tired of begging, pleading, screaming, crying, whining and fighting with them to get the most simple thing done on a daily basis.
Every day I get the foot stomping, eye rolling, exasperated sighing and various under their breath comments that every mom has came to accept. And I will not stand for it anymore.

Yes its easier to ignore it, walk away from it, or just throw a fit in general. BUT, I have come to find out that it takes WAY too much energy and time away from me- Eventually what I want done gets done, but at great risk to my mental wellbeing and their physical wellbeing.
I am trying to find a solution to this- one that keeps me out of jail, and possibly them out of therapy. although to be honest, the latter is not of much concern to me. They will need someone to blame their lifes failures on, may as well be me right... :)

I sent my truck in for repairs on Monday- I had to have it towed to Lufkin- I am praying its just that stupid EGR cooler thing- just another EPA regulation to make our vehicles less efficiant and more expensive.

I am doing great with this not smoking thing- by switching to a personal vaporizer or electronic cigarette- well except for one small problem. See, when you have stick that is actually ON fire, you tend to watch where you set it, but when you have something that just 'fires' when you tell it to, and is convenient to sit down, or put in your pocket, you tend to set it down, or put it in your pocket- CONSTANTLY- which means I am always looking for it. This is a small price to pay- and honestly, I used to have to search for lighters the same way- but, at times it can get annoying.

I am 58 days in- not even a major pang for a cigarette- I am really proud- I have never stuck with any 'quit smoking' thing this long, without being ready to jump off a bridge, or throw someone else off one.

It is labor intesive- not to the point of taking up your whole day- but think of it as if you were having to roll your own cigarettes. occasionally you have to take the time to refill a cartridge, or clean your filters and such- but, I get to 'vape' strawberry pie flavored nicotine- or butterscotch, or watermelon. I am IN LOVE. if you are courious about how to quit smoking and start vaping- check out
AND DONT buy one from a gas station- they are a waste of money-

I am letting the kids go on an archery shoot next month- The boys, this will be their first trip away from home. I am SOOO apprehensive about it. Not that I am worried about them, or the people they are going with. I trust them totally. But I dont trust my kids no further than I can throw them. They will do SOMETHING to make people wonder if they have ANY home training, or act a fool, or worse, tell half of a story about something and make me look like a worse parent than I really am.

Now, everyone's hour of free time is up and we are fixing to start our 4 hours of school for the day- wish me luck!! or them.

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Luckily Blessing are not eggs- you CAN put them all in one basket

well a title eludes me-

most times I think of a title and then write. But for the last few days- I just couldn't think of one, and so I didn't write.

Its been kinda hard to write a funny and upbeat blog this week- and noone reads this to get depressed- SO- I have tried to store up some funnies- of course, I cant remember any of them- :)

BUT- lets get the bad part out of the way-

A dear family friend lost his battle with Cancer this week- Him and his wife have been a part of my life for my entire life- they were best friends with my grandparents- Heck, I didn't know we wernt kin till I was grown. Miles Weaver you will be missed-

A wonderful woman who I have known for years lost her newborn baby on the same day. She has known that Faith Renee was going to have a short life outside of the protective embrace of her body, but pre eclemsia moved her due date up 2 months and so she didn't have as much time as she wanted with this darling gift from God. Tonya, Todd and her beautiful girls have shared this awful time with so many of us, showing us what true faith looks like- Its amazing how many lives a baby that's never taken a single breath could touch- but before this sweet angel was even born she had taught more people the true meaning of faith and love then a thousand lectures ever could.

And my great aunt, who has taken care of my uncle and is one of the hardest working women I know, fell and broke her arm- right under her shoulder on Friday night- Due to where its at, they can not set it- I am thankful it wasn't a hip- But, its bad none the less.

now onto the selfish, feel sorry for me, part of my week-

Our calf died- well, she wasn't a calf anymore she was over a year old, but was .... for lack of a better term- mentally insufficient. She was blind, had been since birth, but she also never grew- she looked like a 3 month old calf her whole life.
She was a happy cow- or as happy as one of Gods dumbest creatures could be. She would follow you around, she would love all over you, and she ate like a horse. But there was just something wrong with her. She wasn't being raised as a pet, like everything else here she had a purpose, and that was to nourish our bodies. But since she wouldn't have made a good batch of sawmill gravy we kept feeding her, and wasting the feed.

My kids gave me HELL all week- I mean to the point that I was ready to throw in the towel. because if I didn't throw it down, I was liable to make a hangman's noose out of it. I did come to the conclusion that kids should NOT come with instruction manuals- instead they should come with a lifetime supply of Prozac, duct tape and earplugs.

BR's personal truck has been down for a week or so, which means I have been driving him back and forth. not a big deal, its 8 miles, and honestly, its only an hour or two before I wake up anyway.
Its just the aggravation of knowing that we have a vehicle down.

I faced some disappointment and annoyance at the community/family cemetery this week. Every year we have a cemetery working, lunch business meeting etc. and there is a board who runs the cemetery.

Now, I have been going to this since I was old enough to drive. I went a few times before then- I would come with family members, but I have went since I could drive. My family has been buried there since the 1800's. Well, it never fails, there is always something to argue about, most times I am NOT involved in the actual argument, but will try to explain it so everyone will understand, and everyone there that is over 60 will look at me like I am a 5 year old int erupting a prayer meeting. OH and there are usually 2-3 people there that are not eligible for Social Security.

They cant STAND it when I speak up- and will actually ARGUE with me, when I am trying to help THEM prove THEIR point. They don't listen to one another, they simply wait for the noise to stop and start talking. One year one of them actually had the NERVE to say "let the adults figure this out" Well, we were TRYING to explain to the 'adults' that they had written "you must have a DESCENDANT in this cemetery to be buried here" INSTEAD of : "you must have a DIRECT ANCESTOR in this cemetery to be buried here"
or "you must be a DESCENDANT of someone buried here"

I was NOT a happy camper that day to say the least. BUT, still I go back- BR wont. He says he has no use for the whole deal. But not me- I love my family's history, I respect everything my family did to make this country what it is, and to make me who I am, so I am determined to be a part of their eternal resting place. Now to say the President of the board doesn't like me is an understatement. Oh she plays a good game- Most of the time, but I know that I am NOT her favorite person. Which is fine, I mean if everyone loved me and worshiped me, I would never have any fun pissing someone off. Right? -

Well, My Great Aunt asked me if I would accept a nomination for the board. I said I would. It was for the vacancy that Uncle Miles left. We go today, and there are people there I have NEVER seen show up for working, meetings, or even lunch- But I was just thrilled to see more people getting involved. Like I said, I think I am the only person who comes who hasnt had a knee replacement, hip replacement, or has most of my real teeth-

anyway, we went over some old business, some new business, and got it all straitened out. THEN, it came time to vote- My Aunts hand went up, but she was ignored and someone else spoke. They were nominating someone who had just moved back here from the big city. - Because she worked with computers and ... I dont know what all- I will be honest, I dont know who the woman is, If she has ever been out there, I wasnt introduced to her- I know almost everyone that comes to those meetings, and can pretty much tell you who's graves they descend from. Well once I was nominated, our President went right into a speech about how this was NOT a Ralph Cemetery (my mothers family)- BUT there was already 2 of the 5 people on the board that were Ralphs (my grandfather, and his sister)- and how it wouldnt be right for ME to be on there too- Well, A Byerly donated the land- and to be honest, and like I pointed out- there wasnt really anyone that wasnt kin on that board. its a small community, and folks had lots of kids back then. And if her 'speech' wasnt enough, her sister chimed in. Saying how it wasnt fair. Now, dont get me wrong- when everyone showed up that morning, they knew who they were going to vote for. I have no doubt in my mind. BUT, I am NOT happy about being blindsided with this. I dont believe that this speach just come off the top of her head- and I dont honestly think she cares who I am kin to- any other time you have to BEG someone to get on the board- She just honestly didnt want me on it- And thats fine- but say so- dont give me some cockamamie story about 'kin folks'. This board has been ran with Byerly's and Ralphs, and Dubose's all its eternity. and a few fights have broken out that pitted brother against brother and cousin against cousin- More than one family fued has started out there and would still be going on, if the participants were not permanent residents of there now.

And anyone who knows me - OR has ever been to a meeting out there, will know that I am the FIRST one to argue with MY FAMILY about whats going on. I am the one who calls them out when they get descendants and ancestors mixed up. So honestly, I am not sore about loosing by one vote, I know it was all about who showed up to vote for who, not who would have been the better person for the job. And like I said, I dont even know who the woman is- she wasnt there yesterday for me to 'recognize' her. It was a popularity contest and Unfortunately, my popular vote was kinda cut short, my great aunt had fallen the night before and broken her shoulder- and her husband was with her, other family was tending to the food stuff for the funeral, and a cousin got called in to work, 2 family members thought it was 11:30 and not 10:30 and one lady who was voting for me, got the names mixed up- Michelle and Melissa are quite simmular- especially when you dont hear real well.

And I am not really sore about the whole situation- But it was just one more thing in a pretty bad week.

On our way to the funeral home for visitation we happened upon a wreck- I knew both ladies in the wreck, luckily only one suffered some minor injuries- the other was fine but sore I am sure, But it was still quite disturbing-

THEN, we had Uncle Miles' Funeral- once it was over I was supposed to go back to the church and serve. But as the funeral possession passed my house, my truck decided to overheat and start blowing white smoke- SO- I whipped myself up into my driveway and we tried to find the problem. If I am right, and have diagnosed it correctly, (I aint a diesel mechanic by any stretch) I think its the ERG cooler- which is basically like your appendix, except it doesnt have a purpose at all- except to make some EPA lawyer smile for getting one over on you. anyway- its some piece of crap that cools the exhaust with water from my radiator or some such- and has broken. lucky for ME its BEHIND the freakin engine- we are talking - total truck tear down.

This morning BR was going to take himself to work in my truck- and now the dang thing wont even start- not sure what is wrong. But I am thinking I need to find me a preacher and get healing hands laid on it for sure. The dadgum thing is in that 'limbo' of not being paid off, but not being under warranty...
SO, if anyone has an old Ford truck- one with a carburetor, and gas lines, and a normal engine in- that they wanna sell for a few thousand bucks- please let me know-

But this is supposed to be a funny blog, something to make you glad you have a normal life and dont live in THIS house- amongst all the crazy - and so far all I have done is whine and depress you.

So- I refuse to count my sorrows- (I am running out of fingers and toes ) I just thought it might be therapeutic to get them on paper- Instead I am going to count my blessings- Uncle Miles is NOT suffering any more- Faith gave each of us a look into our own souls, not to mention her family showed us that love CAN overcome even the hardest of sorrows- BR's truck is a Toyota- even with a few hundred thousand miles on it, its got life left- we just gotta get the gas to the engine without a sputter- The calf wasnt getting any bigger, but I refused to admit I had screwed up when I got her- all I could see wast ribeue on the hoof.
Noone was seriously injured IN that wreck- And lots of folks stopped at 5pm on a Friday to help people they didnt know (till we got them out, it is a small town after all)- My truck can be fixed, if not, its not the end of the world, God will show me a way- And I am young- I still got LOTS of years of tending the cemetery left in me- including the graves of those who dont like me.

Lets see- my favorite Uncle Miles and Aunt Lynn story- My grandparents had a 'bar' that we ate at- it was about 4 feet high- and every meal except Thanksgiving was served there- so Aunt Lynn and Uncle Miles were visiting, and all weekend he had been showing off his new fangled hearing aids- And EVERYONE was trying to convince my grandfather he needed to get some too- Well, during breakfast that morning, my grandmother asked if anyone needed anything else- Automatically, Aunt Lynn, who for years had the responsibility of repeating everything said to Uncle Miles because he couldnt hear a buffalo fart, leaned over right in his ear and said rather loudly "DORIS ASKED IF YOU NEEDED ANYTHING ELSE" - Forgetting all about those newfangled hearing aids that he had just spent a small fortune on- and Uncle Miles pert near fell off his chair. I think it was another 15 years before my grandmother convinced my grandfather to get hearing aids. AND I just recently found out that when he does wear them, he turns them off when all my kids come around....

and something my kids did this week- OH Rayley cut Bows hair, on THURSDAY! we had funerals, and everything else- Ugggg-- I dont know WHY she cut it, but she did- So we had to put in an emergency call to our beautician- who luckily is also my cousin, and does housecalls...

OH and Bertha Sue, with her pink hair and her prissy walk, and her eyelashes batting came walking into my house the other day- with a BONE- like a leg bone from something- not huge, but a good foot or so long- and told me she wanted to figure out how to carve something out of it, and make a chair with that pelvis that the dogs drug up. That it would fit in her barbie house and then Ken and Barbie would have a 'trophy' room like other big game hunters- so she could pretend they got to go on safari and hunt.

We argued for about 10 minutes, and finally I put my foot down, said "GET IT OUT OF MY HOUSE" and turned around to walk off, her spitting and sputtering about how mean I was and never let her decorate her own barbie house and .... I dont know something about the world coming to an end and I was the cause of it- blah blah blah- (on a side note, I will get it out of her room this week and throw it on the burn pile-)

So, I come on in the living room, and sit down for a little while- Rayley asked if she could eat something, I told her yes, to wash her hand first- Then, I get the remote and start trying to find something- In comes Miss Priss- sandwich in hand and plops herself down in the chair like she has good sense. - I pay her no mind, instead I turn it on "mounted in Alaska" its a show about a taxidermist who does some amazing mounts.

Next thing I know- Pricess Whinesalot says "REALLY? Mounted in Alaska? I AM trying to eat here ya know!" Like this grossed her out-

she had JUST been involved in disposing of a calf- and toting around a bone from God knows what- wanting to pretend its a trophy for her barbie- (who by the way needs a pink gun I was told.....) and she is offended by a show about tanned leather and plaster forms?? Heck, she was just asking me not too long ago how many rabbits it would take to make a fur coat since she has a sewing machine and all....

Monday, May 9, 2011

NEVER Return to the scene of the crime-

The banquet was a BLAST!

We worked hard but over 14,000.00 was given to our local 4-H group and Police Dept. -

Our day started by putting together and setting up all the merchandise- that's always controlled chaos-

And once the kids get done they are wilder than a band of wild Indians. and somehow someone always gets hurt- First it was Bertha Sue- she hurt her finger, BR took care of it- she went back off to play- THEN the next time it was Brett who came in with blood pouring from his thumb- I was busy doing treasurer stuff and didn't have a band aid, but someone had some electrical tape- and a friend of mine is a taxidermist so we were good to go-

We left there and had to come home to get dressed to go back- Bow was going to stay with my mother in law, but decided he wanted to go with us. Uggggggg NOT what I wanted to do- I am so busy I cant even say hello to half the people I know, and keep up with the older kids- much less keep an eye on a 2 year old who gets bored easily.

We had a great turnout and our 4-H kids helped us SOOO much~! Even Bow went this time- I think he was pretty good- honestly, I am not sure- I saw him running through a few times, dragging a trash can helping out, and one time a friend came by to tell me she had corralled him and redressed him, as he decided it was time to get all comfy and strip down.

Rayley impressed quite a few folks, I had people I didn't know coming up to me and saying "that MUST be your daughter with the pink hair!" when I said "uhhhhhhh... yeah.... " they would say things like "I KNEW it was, she has your same bubbly personality!" or "she is cute as can be! and she looks JUST like you!" " well she is you made over- she had me ROLLING with laughter" or my favorite "I knew she was, she is the sweetest thing, and pretty as a picture"

Now, granted, most of these folks were drunk, but its nice to know she can pull the wool over folks' eyes (and me for that matter) and they think we are nice and funny, and even cute!!

One time a friend that I hadn't seen since High School stopped me- She said "that must be your daughter with the pink hair"
"Yeah, " I said laughing with a scared chuckle
"well she is ADORABLE! I saw her coming out of the bathroom and said 'OMG you have GOT to belong to Michelle Byerly' and she said 'yes ma'am' And she asked if I knew you, and I told her 'yes, we were friends in school' and then she asked if I knew her dad and told her that yes, I knew him from school too. So she looked up at me and said "so you know we Byerly's are not nice people right?"

ROFLMAO! I swear, you NEVER know what my kids will say-

But I did get compliments on my kids all night- I was very proud- they were polite, and helpful, and worked hard.

Anyway, BR and I found a few things we were interested in, put our raffle tickets in the buckets, prayed for the best and went to work. AND LORD did we work. He had to rebox all the guns, and I was at the check in/checkout table.

Then as the night was winding down, they started drawing the raffle tickets- we got an adorable coat rack with the NRA stamped on it and the hooks are shotgun shells.

BR got a gun bag for the new .22 off the silent auction table, and then they did the 5 gun draw. I almost died when they called out our name second! we had won the Henry Golden Boy .22!! I have always wanted one of these- they are SOOOO pretty!! And I am laying claim to it- since the guys got that ugly Smith and Wesson 10-22 thing the other day.

THEN, some friends of ours won the last gun of the night- a Kimber pistol! I was pleased that 2 of the 250 raffle tickets I sold won guns- I thought that was a pretty good average.

Yesterday we did NOTHING- I barely even cleaned the house- I just did what was necessary to get by, we had gotten home well after midnight and didn't fall into bed until after 2am. We have to clean up the venue before we leave, and get all the trash gathered up and such, plus count all the money, tickets etc. So, its a long night. You should see my poor truck, I bet there are 12-14 60 gallon bags in it. PLUS about 45 broken down boxes. We had to put straps across the stuff to keep it in the back while I drove home!

Even Bow helped us with the trash- and he was still going strong at 1:30- I mean STRONG!

Of course, like every other week, it had to come to an end- one minute we were enjoying being lazy and doing nothing, and the next, it was 2am Monday morning and BR had to go to work! His Toyota is messed up again, (if anyone wants a good mechanic, holler at me- I will tell you which one is NOT), and so I am driving him to his job- its only 8 miles, so its not like its hard.

Anyway- This morning at 2am I got up and drive BR to work, I was worried about loosing a bag of trash, I had lost one somewhere on the way home we thought, but as I came back to the house from his job I didn't see any bags, so I decided I was safe.

THEN, BR texted me- said "there is a bag of trash at the river bridge on 63" well, that's the way we came home Saturday night- SO I jumped in my truck, still in my Chip and Dale fluffy sleep pants and shirt, hair all a mess, no makeup and head out to pick up trash on the side of the road, at 2:30 AM.

I got there, got turned around, got the bag of trash, tried my hardest to put it in the back and just couldn't make it fit. SO, I threw it in the backseat, jumped back in the truck, looked in my side mirrors, because the trash in the back of my truck is stacked WELL over the cab, I cant see out the back glass- SO, I looked out my side mirror, went to turn off my hazards and pull out and what is behind me? A county Mounty... yep- the police, with their lights a spinnin and the spotlight shinin....

well hell.

So- I jumped out- IN my blue and pink chip and dale, sleepwear, hoping like heck that I wasn't in the wrong place at the wrong time, and there hadn't been a person stealing trash from folks houses and then driving up and down the highway throwing it out and I was gonna get confused with them.

The passenger of the police car got out, mag light shining, like the spotlight, headlights and flashing red and blue lights were not enough to identify me-

So, I start trying to explain exactly WHY I am in the middle of the road road at 2:30AM in my Pjs'. Looking like something the cat dragged in and the dog didn't want.

I recognized the cop right away, and just hoped he did me- He did. and as I was telling my story, 'had all this trash from the banquet, waiting on the dump to open, BR passed by in his 18 wheeler and saw the trash, he texted to tell me I had dropped a bag, I came to get it, blah, blah, blah, he said "Michelle?" I said "YEP!:) " "Girl, I just cant believe someone would come back to pick it up! Especially at 2 in the morning! I would have told BR what he could do" He said they wouldnt have ever known who did it-

Honestly, I had every intention of picking up anything I dropped- I was just glad that it wasnt like last year, when it was boxes and Styrofoam that was flying everywhere- And I was glad BR had saw it and called me. But I figure that its JUST my luck that I see 2 cars in the 45 minutes I was on the highway, and ONE happens to be a COP! The three of us agree'd - you should NEVER return to the scene of the crime, thats how they catch ya!!

I loaded myself back up, and came home-

Friday, May 6, 2011

why must everything run on batteries?

My kids never get sick- oh I hear the 'my stomach hurts' all the time, for which I usually tell them the age old remedy for. And they do get migraines, which they COULD avoid if they tried, all of their triggers are obvious and usually avoidable. But they just dont get SICK- the other morning I am sitting here in my recliner, Bow is in his usual place, kinda behind my left shoulder because I am kinda twisted around playing on the computer. all of a sudden I hear "mom, me not feel good" and then it hit me between the shoulder blades, and proceeded to roll all the way down my back, and INTO my pants. I couldnt even move. Then it hit me, and I hated to laugh, I mean there is a miserable 3 year old beside me saying "i sorry oma, i sorry" but I couldnt help it, I had to laugh- IT went DOWN my pants. So, then you have to make the decision, do you run with your baby to the toilet, get a warm washrag and wipe him down, pamper him and love on him, while you see if there is anything else left in his tiny little tummy waiting to be expelled, OR do you get up and go strait to YOUR bathroom and strip, then jump in a hot shower? Well, being the loving and devoted mom I am- I said "ohhh baby, its okay- do you need to puke some more?" "do you feel better??" "Momma's not mad baby-" as I was walking quickly to the shower, shucking clothes as I went.

The day got better from there- Nothing as bad- but just a thousand little things that when added together make you want to sit in a dark room in the fetal posistion, rocking back and forth, while sobbing uncontrolably and cursing the day you were born.

BUT- even in the face of ALL the adversity, I havent had a cigarette!!

And if being puked on wasnt enough to send you to the nearest store to buy a carton of poison laden tabacco wrapped in paper dipped in arsnic, my darling mother in law was nice enough to buy my children a 'paper jamz' - NOW, if you dont know what this is, its a cardboard guitar, that takes batteries and you 'play' it. Its loaded with rock songs. So far I have only heard ONE I recognize, 'rockstar ' by Nickleback. The rest are some God Awful headbanging crap that I wouldnt have listened to if Bon Jovi or Axel Rose had been singing it. None of the 4 play the same songs, and for a peice of paper they are extreamly loud. VERY loud. I cant wait for one of the dogs to accidentally tear them up. Unfortunatly, they have managed to take better care of these cheap miagraine inducers then they do their own computers. THis is how China is going to take over the world- By all these toys they are sending over here at cheap prices, and gullible americans are buying up left and right while waiting on their prozac prescriptions from the pharmacy to get ready. Because no sane person could purposly allow these noisemaking, nerve grating toys into their home unless they were under a pharmasutical induced cloud of 'happy'. But you mark my words- "noisy annoying toys from China are the downfall of American Freedom - everyone with a child between 2 and 25 is admited to mental hospitals begging for shock therapy" will be the headline in a newspaper one day.

Our banquet for the Friends of the NRA is tomorrow night- I just am amazed at how quickly time flies by. The next two days are going to be quite busy- we set up tonight and then tomorrow we put together all the merchandise and at 5:30 we open the doors.

Sunday, May 1, 2011

just normal boring days around here-

well, I have already let myself slide-

Its hard to come in here and write like I used to- I guess because everytime something strikes me as funny, I put it on facebook, so I fiqure there is no sense in writing it here too-

I will work on that- either stop posting on facebook, or start watching the kids closer to get double the tales to tell....

Today we went to a gunshow- I got to drive- BR does NOT like my driving. AT ALL. you know those cartoons where the wife is griping about the husbands driving? or all the sitcoms where she sits there and harps on him the entire time? thats my truck- But I am driving- He used to make me so nervous that I would be a basket case before we got the 20 miles into town. But in the last year I have gotten to where I handle it better. Used to I couldnt even relax- now I am able to sit back and drive.
Anyway- we all loaded up today and drove a few hours to a gunshow- Nothing like taking MY kids to a place that has nothing but guns and knives. they were IN HEAVEN! I bet we walked around that place 8 times. Even Bow was good- and everyone had to comment to Rayley about her pink hair- which she loves.

we didnt find what we were looking for there- So we went on to Academy and got the new gun. When we got home I dont even think the kids came in the house- they went strait to the shooting lane to try it out.

They are doing shooting sports again, and its shotgun season right now- The boys did real well- although, at one point, I was busy- I was in charge of handing out ammunition to all the kids, and they had started shooting- Next thing I hear is Brett saying "Mom, MOM, MICHELLE" -
"Hoover just got one!"
well, for me thats not news- they do it here all the time- so, me, being the supportive and loving mom I am says " way to go boy, momma's proud" and gave him an exaggerated thumbs up. Everyone thought this was funny- to which Brett proceeded to tell me that was NOT right- and it was embarrassing when I did that-

Uhhhhh-- he was the one HOLLERING for me, to tell me that Hoover had got one. like it was the first time he ever held a shotgun.

I just laughed and told them that was what I was there for- to embarrass them, and that I was glad I was doing my job to the utmost of my ability.

BUT, that wasnt the best 'part'- While the big kids are shooting, the young kids play in the dirt- Well, its another young boy thats about Bow's age, and another girl thats Rayley's and a few in between.

The younger kids were between me, (and I was up with the shooters) and the other moms who were at the lines of cars- The moms started laughing, and calling my name- Come to find out- The treat that I always buy for the kids on the way to shooting sports is going to have to cease. -- See, I always get them a soda, its once every two weeks and I fiqure it wont hurt. WELL- it wouldnt if Bow had ANY modesty or home training. which after last Thursday I have come to understand he has neither of.

This child just gets the urge to pee, so he stands up, and lets loose- the kids have to cover up the wet spot and move down to fresher dirt.

UGGGGGGG I swear I teach my kids manners! And really try to work hard with them. I tell them, "dont pee off the front of the porch by the steps, go down to the edge, where it doesnt matter if you kill the grass"

THEN, at the end, I am giving directions for the kids for our next fundraiser, and the other little boys mom is standing back there, jumping up and down, calling my name again. I am standing on a trailer, trying to look everyone in the eye; working to get all the information out there, and express how important this even is- and she is laughin her head off and jumping up and down. HE WAS DOING IT AGAIN!!

OMG! SO, all these folks that dont know what he had been doing are paying attention to me, and he is 10 feet behind them, and I cant help it- I have to scream "BOWDRIE MARSHALL!" yep, everyone turned around and saw him....

I am very lucky that for the most part the folks out there are country folks too- so, at the very least they have all had a relative who has no couth and can deal with it just smiling at each other and saying "bless her heart" and letting it go.

BUT, we did have some new kids out there- I hope their parents were not traumatized too badly.

I have been busy with cakes lately- unfortunately, Business is fixing to taper off quit quickly- I am going to have to significantly raise prices. Its a shame, I would love for everyone to have a really cool cake for a cheap price, but I just cant keep doing them for free.

I have been smoke free for 41 days now- and I STILL love it. There is nothing more exhilarating than to know I can live my life without a cigarette. and today, on the way home, I was having breath holding contests with Brett! I dont know how good I did- because it started annoying BR while I was driving and he took away our stop watch. LOL If you know someone who needs to quit, please look into a personal vaporizer, or ecig. its amazing- just dont buy the crappy ones at a gas station- they aint worth it- for not much more you can get something MUCH better!

The farm is pretty normal, we have lots of hogs we need to butcher, but its way too hot- and I have a beautiful smokehouse that we still havent gotten to use.

Today marked the first day of squirrel season, so the boys will be changing up their schedule a little- now, its going to be:
up before dawn,
take the dogs hunting,
come home and feed
THEN start school.

This will last maybe a day- they HATE getting up early. And honestly, I'd rather have an hour or so to myself before they DO wake up.

Although they do love any opportunity to head to the woods- especially if there is hunting involved! They have been rabbit hunting the last week or so- its a night time thing, so they REALLY love that- no 8:30 bedtime- But they HATE the 6am wakeup call!! I keep telling them "it doesnt matter HOW late you go to bed, you STILL have to get up in the morning to wake up the chickens!"

Easter was great- All my inlaws came over and watched the kids hunt eggs, and we all visited on the porch for a while- and we finally got some rain last week- and hail!

Now, I am fixing to make BR's breakfast and lunch, set the computer to download some drivers for the printer and pray that makes it do wireless printing!

I have worked on making it be wireless for days now- And I can NOT get them to pair up. I am afraid that the only way I will get them paired up is to literly shove the computer INTO the printer and throw them BOTH out the window.

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Remember me?

Okay, its been a year- I cant believe its been an entire year- All I can say is Facebook spoiled me.

I still tattle on my kids, I just do it in 140 char. or less now.

BUT, I will also do a quick recap for everyone- in the last year:

*Rayley has become a full time homeschool child
*Bow has grown so much- he can spell his name and CAT and DOG
*We got 3 new dogs, 2 grown squirrel dogs and one new puppy
*My cake buisiness has really blossomed- I did 74 cakes last year- I averaged making 4.63 on each cake- BUT, I enjoyed it. I have done 20 or so this year too.
*Brett got bit by a coral snake- it was a dry bite, but beings how its the most poisonous snake in these parts so he was very lucky.
*BR went to work on the worst day of the year, (it never snows or ices in Jasper) and fell 25 feet down a set of metal stairs and pulled his pinky finger off.
* I quit smoking- a few times, but this last time its stuck- (I am VERY proud of this) and instead I use a personal vapor -
*our farm has grown by about 10 pigs, a feinting goat and did we have the blind calf last time I blogged?
*The kids got to butcher their first hog with Rayley and Bow right in the middle
* We butchered our second set of broilers- This time Rayley got to help AND I have Video to prove it-
*Brett killed his first AND second deer- at the same time-
*I took my conceal Carry class- and passed! I shot that target UP!
*Brett learned how to pull a piglet during birth
*Hoover kept us laughing-
*Rayley has PINK hair on purpose
*I got a beautiful new porch
*I built a really cool smokehouse
*The boys got new bows for Christmas, Rayley got her pink .22 and Bow- who knows what that child got-
*My boys are as big as I am- (that might not be saying much- ) Rayley still hasnt grown into her feet and Bow is.... well Bow- They have changed alot in the last year- BUT are still the same kids- They have grown alot, but still work the ONLY nerve I have left- They are getting more mature every day, and yet I swear I will never get them grown enough to subject the world to them.
*The boys brought home 2 pups who destroyed my AC ducts during the hottest days of the summer-
*Bow decided to start using the toilet for its inteded use and not as a bathtub.
*I destroyed BR's tractor-
*I became addicted to games on facebook and cant stop

Honestly, I dont know what all has happened- its been a fast and fun year- one I wish I had blogged about, because already I am forgetting what happened-

We are hitting the preteen years on the boys, Rayley is becoming more of a drama queen, and Bow is.... well BOW- mean as a snake and smart as a whip and is always into something.

I will try my hardest to get back into the swing of things- start writing again- maybe relate a few of the stories from the last year before I forget them. And hope to entertain you again for years to come!

BUT, right now we have to get ready for Church- OH thats another thing- and very possibly the most important- all 3 of my older childern gave their life to the Lord and were saved this year- They are a true blessing and if we can all survivie their raising, I think they might make some good people-

Ya know, there have been a hundred times I came in here to blog, but I would say "well crap, I cant tell this story without telling the story about XX and YY" and dont have time for that- SO- I wouldnt do it. I wish I had- But now I am taking the plunge and WILL start back.

Thanks for always reading, Thanks for asking me when I was going to blog again, and most of all, thanks for taking the time to read about my crazy life-