I quit smoking on March 22, 2011 with Electronic Cigarettes

Monday, February 16, 2009

5 words you NEVER want to hear from your kids.

"Mom, Look what I found"

THis blog was supposed to be about the last few days. So here is a short synopsis.
Thursday and Friday were both spent with me at the school. We were supposed to make about 500 cookies for the kids that were getting to go skating, Our principal had got 4 boxes of otis spunkmeir (sp) cookies and we had borrowed the ovens. They each cook 3 dozen cookies at a time, for 18 minutes. We had it down to the minute on how long it would take. And I knew exactly how many to put in each of the 8 tin pans that we had bought.

Then the time came and went and the pans were overflowing, with another box to go. Finally I called the 800 number on the box. She told me 105 cookies per box. Not the 150 that we were told. That was NOT good news, we had promised each kid 2 cookies! But then I heard her say 3oz cookies. Ours were 1.33 oz cookies, so I asked again. OH, there are 240 cookies in each of those boxes.

Luckily this lady was not offended by salty language. As a matter of fact she was laughing so hard she couldnt speak. a THOUSAND cookies, give or take 40. No wonder it was 3:00 before we were done! We only had about 5 dozen left at this point. So why stop now?

Then on Friday it was Carnation day. We wrapped, water pic'd, beribboned and delivered 200 carnations to the kids.

Matt had said weeks ago that he wanted his to go to Laney, this little girl is the daughter of my best friend from High School, and the reason we have Rayley. He has been in love with her off and on since he was 4.
Then she started 'going with' his friend, so he changed girls, then they broke up, Then he changed girls again, so's not to hurt his friends feelings, then he went back when Laney told him that they were 'going together' again. But, this didnt happen till Thursday. Come to find out, his teacher didnt even let him give her the carnation. She didnt give them their flowers till the bell was ringing, and they couldnt go and find their recipeients. He was broken hearted.

On Saturday we went and planted taters. We got most of them planted, but still had some to go. Uncle Gerald was going to see if a cousin wanted the taters, but his feilds are underwater. So he came up to the corn patch where BR was plowing and mentioned it. We ended up putting in 2 more rows. about 70 feet long.

The small tater feild its only 8 rows

The old and the new. This is BR and Uncle Gerald. BR stop working on my corn feild long enough to break up the tomatoe patch.

This is about half or 3/4 of my corn feild. save the last two rows. Those are in taters. and 80 days from now we will be diggin them up! WHOO-HOO!!

This is Brett driving the Mule in from the fields, Notice the death grip my grandfather has? I think he took the turn on 2 wheels.

Sunday we started to look at where we were going to put the coop. While we were measuring it we were trying to do a 10x10 pen. We measured 10 feet out, 10 feet down the hog fence, then 10 feet out, and 10 feet back to the first 10 feet out. Then we did the diagnal. one was 13.6 feet, the other 14.6. We did everything we could think of. It just wouldnt come together. we knew their was a formula. But couldnt come up with it.
The Pythagorean Theorem was kickin our butts. Finally we came in and fired up the trusty internet to get the formula. a2 + b2 = c2. And then we knew 14.1 feet was our answer. I will admit, I called my grandfather, the engineer for a little help. He got out his calculator and was able to help.

Once we got the places marked I fiqured that we should go ahead and dig those holes. So, I got the post hole diggers and started. Fiquring that BR wouldnt let me do it and take it from me. I was wrong. I managed to dig that entire hole. Does the word MO-RON ring a bell?

He did dig the others.

We did each one then set the post. While we were working on it, my darling kids came running up, They were carrying a jacket all balled up. And screaming "Guess what we found!?" "yeah mom!! Can we keep it?!!"

There was the moment of sheer terror. I felt my stomache drop, my palms began to sweat, and I stuttered "what is it?"

Out popped a crawfish. They had been down in the drain playin in the mud. And had- acording to them- chased that thing all over. Now, I much prefer my craw fish in a pot of boiling water, but dont freak out when I see one. I was just glad it wasnt another snake.

When you cant find your kids, look up.

The crawfish in its new home- I am sure its thrilled.

Even Rayley was in on the action. I told them that they could put him in the empty fish tank that the crab used to be in.

We got everything set, and I came in and started crunching the numbers on getting the materials needed. I might not can do the pythagorean theorem off the top of my head, but I can fiqure out how to get a 10X5 wall, two 4X5 sides and all the chicken boxes out of 4 4X8 sheets of OSB.

And how to make the most out of the other lumber I needed.

Today I didnt really want to go to town, but we were out of milk. And a few other things. Plus, I may as well go ahead and get the lumber too. I didnt want to, but dang. Then while I was still on the fence about going in today, or waiting until tomorow when I go in for the 'coffee with the superentendant, a mystery shopping company called, a hardware store in town needed a shop done. and the bonus was 25.00! that sealed the deal. I decided to go in today. BUT the kids (who I kept out today since it was Presidents day) were down at the drain again! I called them up with the truck alarm. Matt came in first, and tried to hide at the door, then run past me.

I stopped him and told him I KNEW they were in mud, just to get dressed. We were going to town. I was going to get ready while Bow was asleep and NOT to wake him.
BRett was next. He had a little less mud. Matt was muddy plumb up to his thighs. and his boots were full of water. Brett was just muddy to the knees and his boots were soaking wet.

Then came in the princess. Hot pink pants, suede boots (that she is NOT allowed to wear to play in) and a T shirt. She was not only soaking wet, but mud was all the way to her hair!

Finally I got them dressed. Then it was time to hook up the trailer. Brett tries, and one day I will have to show him the proper way to back someone up to a trailer. Finally I decided I was close enough and just pushed the trailer the 4 inches to get it on the ball and off we went. 2 hours at the hardware store, part of which included mixing two cans of paint, cause the first one was HOT pink, then purple. FINALLY I got a somewhat barn red. Plus a trip to another for some boards that were half the price, and another to Tractor Supply, for my wire (half price from the hardware store... major shocker!)

Then we had to go grocery shopping. Oh, did I mention I had all 4 kids? Bow was SOOO good.

I was actually so wanting to get home, OH and it was raining and I had UNTREATED OSB on the trailer, I didnt even use coupons.

So, when we got home I grabbed up the tarp, threw it on the trailer, and we unloaded all the groceries. It wasnt much. I just got the bare essentials.

I came in and started supper. Fried Chicken, Fried Okra, mashed taters and corn on the cob. Not the kind of supper you want to cook when you have been in town for 7 hours with 4 kids. BUT, it was what I had ready to go.

While I was cooking the kids busted in the house, They had been outside playing while I cooked and Bow screamed at my feet.
"mom, we have a small problem"
"Duke and Darla are out at the fence barking and after something"
"well I am frying okra, I cant do anything right now"
They went back out and I got to the point of being able to set the grease off the fire, so I walked out. I could hear Darla raising a fuss.
I asked where the dogs were.
"down by the highway"
our fence runs on the side of the highway, and the dogs can go through the fence. Duke isnt bad about getting on the road, he has done it once, and got ran over. I mean SMOOTH over. by a doulley and a tandem axel trailer. He was fine. I dont know how. But I saw it, waiting on the kids to get off the bus. It was so scary. I mean I have had this dog since before I had kids. Matter of fact, BR got him when I was told I could never have kids.

So, I started to freak out a little. If they are after something, they have no sense. Then BRett hollered that it was just Darla, Duke was with them.

I told them to go and fetch Darla. See what she was barking at, and bring her home.

About 10 minutes later, Matt busts in the door.
"We lost the trail of it, but look at this cool feather I found!"
"get that OUT of my house. I am cooking and its nasty!"
"its a buzzard feather and I wanta keep it"
"I KNOW what it is! GET IT OUT!!"

So, he sulked and then hid it in his room.

Next thing I know, while I am shoveling breaded okra into hot splattering grease, with a screaming kid under my feet and Rayley on a stool trying to 'oblsarve' and 'learn how to cook'; the door busts open and in comes Brett.

"I found what Darla was chasing!" He said, while holding a black blob.
I looked harder. It had a HUGE beak, and it was OPEN.
"buutttt mom...."

So he walked back out.

Then it dawned on me. the CAMERA!
so I ran to get it.
ran out the door and he was letting it go.
*disclaimer* there were some other words in there that I didnt repeat here.

I mean how often does your wonderful and loving son, the one you have borne, raised and have high hopes for, bring a freaking GROWN buzzard into your house?


When asked how in the hell one catches a buzzard, Brett answered "I just jumped on it"

When asked why did you catch it, cause I thought he had more sense than that I got "you never told me not to catch a buzzard"

As a logical and therorizing human, I just assumed that there were certain things you dont have to TELL someone. Apparently I was wrong.

I fiqured it was hurt, I mean no kid can catch a buzzard, but still. what kid would want to?

I dread what they come up with next. I really do.

*edited to add*

I got up to get something to eat and look at what I saw about 10 feet from my window.

So, being the idiot I am, I ran outside - barefoot- to get you some pics.
I couldnt get with in 20 feet of it. I have no CLUE how that idiot caught it.

And let me tell you, this thing is UGLY. and menacing. *shiver*

look at this beak. It could tear you LIMB from LIMB! he was carrying this thing against his chest. with its head by his head. He is lucky to have a NOSE!

I am telling you- this thing is evil! Look at the beak.


Karen said...

Good Lord! Go make a list right now! No catching skunks should be #1. Then no rattlers, no live hornet's nests, no bears...

maidto5 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
maidto5 said...

OH hell. they JUST released bears up here. DANG!

Lets see, they have done
wasps nests (with the wasps still in them)
rabbits (oh wait, that was me....)

I have to quit now... my blood pressure is going up.... LOL

erin said...

Yep, thats a turkey buzzard!
You should add Black Bears, and ..well hell just tell them anything with Fins, Fur or Feathers!

maidto5 said...

and skin, scales, wings, extra legs...... LOL