buffets and buffoons...

Sorry I didnt write last night, BR comendeered the puter yesterday a little before noon. I fell asleep at 1am and he was still on it. I am not sure what all he looked for but I know Peterbilt was a part of it!

It was his last night off and other than cooking and cleaning we didnt do much. We did run over to his cousins for a little while and I had to PRY Rayley away. THey have a 3 year old daughter too and they were playing dress up and she was in HOG heaven!

Today Rayley and Bow and I had an eventless day, THANK GOD! Oh she showed her drama queen tendancies a few times. Bow has started to PLAY all day. He just laughs, and jumps, and gets all beside himself. He is one of the happiest babies I have ever seen. I did get a phone call from the school. The nurse was calling to tell me Matt had hit his head at PE on a brick wall. THANK GOD! When she said "Matt got hurt today in PE, he hit a brick wall" I was imagining something bad. As it was he hit the safest place he could.

When the kids got home I asked about homework and their notes. Both kids had subs today. Thats about right! But both subs sent home notes telling me that they had put the notes on the teachers desks.

BR called me around 6:30, his 'new' old truck was screwing up. Seems the lights that were wrote up a few days ago were still stumping everyone and he couldnt drive. Oh and it was spewing fresh motor oil. He was basicly like Hanzel and Gretel, which is a good thing when you dont know where you are going, but when the EPA can jump on you like a chicken on a june bug you tend to shy away from depositing unacceptable fluids in public. He wanted to run into town and grab a bite to eat.

They boys were still dressed from school, right?

UHHHH yea.. But Rayley was on her 6th change of clothes, this time as a cowboy/cheerleadering spiderwoman, I was still in my jammies ( okay, no suprise there...) and Bow was wearing one of his nightgowns. I got up and started getting ready, found clothes for Rayley and started the 'dressing' fight. Dressing Rayley is always a fight. Sometimes I play along, sometimes I conjole, and other times I get onery and stomp my foot.
The boys had each came home with a new toy. My MIL had stopped by walmart and had to buy them something. I guess since they each only left their homework at school 4 times instead of 5 and 'forgot' notes 3 out of 4 times, they deserved a reward. well BRett got some spiderman and idiot dolls that shoot things. And Matt got these 'fizzies' that you disolve in bathwater and they have a dinosaur inside. He proceeded to disolve each one. That made my entire house smell like an old woman. Now I am a special kind of person. I have smell induced miagraines. NOT all smells, BUT some smells will set one off.
The smell of this crap had done it, right about the time that BR called. I was trying to get 3 of us dressed, hair done and makeup on. Nothing fancy, but something presentable. Well little Bertha Mae (yes my kids have odd nicknames) picked today to want to go to town as a ballerina/cheerleading/princess/fairy. I wanted a cute 3 year old. I won.

I made sure everyone else was dressed. Told Matt to put his boots on the OTHER feet. and told them it was cold outside. To wear a jacket.

BR got home. We were ready to leave. and as they are walking by him he stopped Matt, asked him what the rule was on putting on his boots. Matt just looks at him.
Then he says "put on my boots, then take them off and put them on the other foot. Cause chances are thats the only way they will be right"
This child has a 50/50 chance of putting his boots on the right feet (except when he gets one of his and one of Bretts) He has NEVER gotten it right. I hope he never gambles.

We made it to town and luck would have it that there was a fishing tournament this weekend! Of course the kids wanted Golden Corral. This is always fun for me.
We got everyone inside, and the first person we see is Matts sub. I have known her since High School and we do the yearbook together. I appologized to her for having him all week and she said he was really very good. LOL like I belive that! I told the boys, this is why I always tell them to be good. I know most of the folks at the schools, and almost all the subs!
Brett went to looking around like a deer in headlights. I asked what was wrong. He said he was making sure his sub wasnt there!

we got them all sat down and I took Rayleys plate and Matt. Well Brett followed. I told them, DONT touch the tongs, I will get what ever you want. I got them each chicken, telling Brett to wait, I'd get that, some shrimp, again with the hands.. I WILL get it if Brett will just give me a chance, Both boys are saying what they want, talking OVER each other and asking questions, telling me which peice, and begging me to let them get it. So it was an honest mistake when I thought Matt pointed to a hush puppy. I put one on his plate. He said "I dont want that" I told him to just take it. I'd eat it. I turn my back to take tongs from BRett and see a hush puppy go flying back towards the buffet. I grabbed it back up and put it on Rayleys plate.

I got Rayley 4 peices of broccoli, a few shrimps and a peice of fish. I got the brats back to the table and BR told me to get my plate. So I did. I always start out with a salad. I love a salad. WIth meat on it. I came back and off he went. I got settled in and started to eat. Well Rayley was done and wanted more Broccoli. I told her to eat 3 shrimps and I would get her more. I took about 4 more bites and she wanted more. I got up and got that. sat back down and started to eat. Bow wanted to sit up and look around, so I got him before I managed to eat most of my plate. Brett wanted a baked tater. Off Bow and I went. Matt wanted more chicken, alright, But this time I put Bow down first. One more bite of salad before the dressin turns on me and Rayley was out of broccoli and had eaten her other 3 shrimps with out any prompting. When I got back Bow was getting tired of laying again. I picked him up and BR headed out. Rayley was steady eating those 'little trees' and loving them. It was all I could do to not gag! But I didnt want to turn her off of them. I have heard they are good for you.

Rayley managed to impress most of the people sitting around us, when she looked outside one time and said "do you know how it gets dark mom? God turns out the lights" there was a collective "aaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwwwwwww" and the "Don't you think its a mite chilly in here" was met with grins and chuckles. OF course the "gosh mom, why dont you ever make good stuff like this at home" (broccoli) was met with disbelief and stares of inadequeteness. I just told her that I reckon'd she needed something to look forward to when we went out to eat.

The boys were okay. Empty plates were only balanced on the head once. only one straw wrapper was blown across the table like a projectile, 2 utinsils dropped, and one foul tasting and offending morsel was spit. I only thumped one ear, kicked one leg and gave 3 "you better straiten up before I go to jail" looks.

By the time I wanted another plate Rayley wanted to go to the bathroom. We went.Me carrying Bow and trying to keep up with her. I got back and Brett wanted some fishBow and I went back to the line. BR finaly went and got me another plate, 3 whole peices of fish. Okay, maybe this is a hint... I was enjoying it when the kids wanted desert.
He took Matt and Rayley and Brett finished up. Matt came back with a bowl FULL of icecream. Come to find out he pulled the lever and walked away. BR caught it before a huge mess was made.
I took Brett and Rayley gave me strict orders as to what she wanted.
Ice Cream in a cloned
with sparkles and glitter.

Ever tried to get ice cream and decorate it holding a squirmy 3 month old? its not fun...
They had soft serve in a bowl, with M&M's and gummy bears. She was not happy with the outcome. But ate it.


Once we got home I told them to get into PJ's and settle in. Right about th etime they had driven me to the brink of drinking, and I was fixing to send them to bed, My sister in law called. it was 9:30 and she wanted the kids.

Hmmmmmm they were kinda hyper.. plus, they were supposed to go to a birtday party the next morning, she had forgotten to tell me.
Well hell.
that meant I would have to get up, get them all dressed, and possibly drive them over. I let her take them.
FOr some reason her and the Brother in law refused to take Bow. something about 'no bottle, no baby'... chickens..

I think I am gona enjoy the quiet, sleep in and get rid of this headache. :)

The house is clean, the kids are asleep and its quiet.

I cleaned today. I KNOW the house was spotless on monday. but it was a mess again today. I think I will go to my grave with dish soap on my hands. And I blew up my vaccum again. I HATE a vaccum. I had not been doing it more than 10 minutes and all of a sudden it starts smoking and making an awful noise. This is the 3rd one I have been through in about a year and a half. And every time I use it I clean it out, wash out the filters and take it apart at the hoses to keep clogs to a minimum. I just keep taking them back to Walmart and giving them 20-30.00 and upgrading. I will work my way up to a Dyson before long.

Rayley and I have this game that we have played since she was old enough to talk.
She says
" I love you mom"
"I love me too"
"NOO I love YOU"
" I KNOW and I LOVE ME too!"
it goes on like this for a little while till she says
" YOU love Rayley"
I say "You love Rayley"
"NO YOU do"
"I what?"
"Love me"
"well of course I love ME!, and YOU love me too!"
"NOOO YOU love ME"
"how sweet, you love me"
she'll finaly get smart and say
"say MOM loves RAYLEY"

We laugh the whole time

Well today she started it and after about the 2nd Ilove me too, she got all upset, flopped herself down on the floor and started pouting..

I just looked at BR.. I mean seriously, if she is this much of a drama queen at 3, can you imagine PUBERTY? I am SCREWED! She cried, she bellowed. She wouldnt even think about speaking to me. The only way to make her happy was for her daddy to pick her up and tickle her. He asked her what was wrong. She told him I was a mean mommy and didnt love her and hated her, and she was just gona die all alone and never have any love.
He let her cling for about 10 minutes, assured her everyone loved her and she was sweet (ahhhh the blissful ignornance of working 6 days a week), and when she got down she was happy and talking and singing. THen she took one look at me and decided to flop back into the floor again!

I just ignored her.

If she is mad at me she doesnt ask me to get up and get her something to drink, or eat, or find her pink ballerina shoe.
Finaly she gets up and then she hugs me and says "I love you mommy"
I said "I love you too Rayley"
She got pissed! Slammed her hand on her hip, gave me a go to hell look and says "MOOOOM, your supposed to say "YOU LOVE YOU!"

OH GOD! I cant deal with this. what do you do? I cant win for losing!
I am so glad Bow cant talk yet.

But he is chewing. and slobberin, and will bite the crap out of you.

I called AT& T today and asked them to PLEASE get me DSL. I am stuck on a 26.8 dial up and just cant handle it any more. THey said they would look into it. Come to find out its avalible about 3 miles down the road, but its not out this far. I am keeping my fingers crossed.

I can not imagine how wonderful it would be. But I have dreamed.

It rained today so we wern't able to go and practice hitting with the boys. I really hate that. Try outs are saturday and I had hoped they would get some practice in before then. BR will only be off today and tommorow. I got to thinking about the set up of our fields last night. I have the 2 furthest fields from each other. On those days that they both are playing I will have to drive to the next feild. Its too far to walk. LOL, by the time I drag Rayley down there both games will be over. Its times like these that I wish BR did have a day job where he could come and watch more.
I might try to bribe one of my Brother in laws to come up there. If he stands far enough back the kids will think its BR and noone will get their feelings hurt. :)

He does make all the games he can, and when its the playoffs he will go in late to work. But practice and normal games are all me. Last year I was lucky enough that the boys were in the line up just far away from each other enough that I couldnt ever go to the bathroom or take Rayley with out missing one of them bat. As soon as one came off the feild the other was going up! And the times I would go and they would be in the outfield they would see me walk by OR they would make a great play and I would get a cell phone call from one of the moms while I was gone!

I am fixing to have to break down and buy bat bags. And Brett needs a new bat. I sure hate that. But we will need them. I know which bags I want. I just dont want to pay the price they are asking. LOL They have some that when they hang they open it kinda has a shelf there for their helmets. The bat is a whole 'nuther story. I see kids out there with a 300.00 bat. NOT gona happen. I get one to fit them, and a nice bat, but NOT one worth a house note! But to get a bat it means a trip to Academy. I sure hate taking BR to Academy!!

I do only have to buy one pair of cleats though. Bretts will fit Matt and when I asked him if he wanted a new pair or would wear them he said " well duh, of course. I dont want any new cleats, I hate tennis shoes and why would you buy me new ones when he just got them comfertable and not so stiff? At least I wont get blisters when I HAVE to wear them" *WHAT? a kid with sense?*
Then he says "of course if you could find some boots with cleats on the bottom I would like to have a pair. DO they make those? well, why NOT? thats just stupid!"

I had to tell him that his basball pants look funny with boots. Remember last year when you wouldnt wear your cleats till you got on the field? it looked funny. "Oh yea. I remember that, are you sure it really looked funny?"
DUH!
Of course since it was a conversation about shoes Rayley decided that she needed some too. I told her that she just got a new pair. she said "yea, but you bought those on CLEARENCE, I need NEW shoes. " okay, who taught the kid that the red tag means clearence?



Anyway, its raining here again, I can hear the thunder over the washer, dryer and the dishwasher. Speaking of which; I got only 3 loads of laundry done today. I was lazy. BUT I did get the dishwasher unloaded, reloaded, washed, unloaded, reloaded again and they are washing. I refuse to touch another dish tonight!

The birds, the bee's and the fires that make them grow

Yesterday I did something I VERY rarely do. I took a shower while all my kids were awake. And noone else was home.

There are many reasons I dont take showers when they are home and will be alone. The least of which is they are equal opportunity destroyers. basicly any opportunity is equally fun and challenging. But I was desperate. Playing baseball was hard work.

I was in the shower for 3 minutes and 27 seconds before Brett came running in.
MOM, MOM, Tony Romo! Here's TOny ROMO!!
Where is HERE?? I mean in the house? on TV? the driveway? I told him it was okay, just not to touch the TV and I would rewind. NO, on a poster he had gotten out of the bag of lunch chips I had bought.
he wanted to show me the poster.
I pulled open the door and told him it was neat.
He told me he would hang it up in the living room for me. I told him it was okay, he could put it in his room.
This seemed confusing to him and he wanted to discuss why. While my hair is dripping shampoo in my eyes, he wants to know why...

I told him it didnt match my decor. So he wanted to put it up in my room. Beside my blue and white Pom Poms from the only Dallas game I have ever been to, and the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader Calender that is a year old, but BR keeps changing the month on like its this years. I told him that since there were other quarterbacks on it I thought it would taint my 'Cowboys' shrine.
OH, okay. Can he put it in his room then?
Yes, please.

so I rinsed my hair and started to lather up my legs. I dont know WHY I thought I would have enough time to shave. Usually I am lucky to get through the hair washing before they start to throw themselves up against the walls in an attempt to check the load bearing weight of the sheetrock and 1X3's that make this trailer a home.
RIght about the time I poised the very dull, and possibly rusty triple blade against that little weird bone on my ankle the door bursts open again.
"MOM, MOM!!"
"WHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTT?"
"There was TRADIN cards in there too!!"
"Really ? Cool, Give one to your brother and sister, I'll be out in a minute."
"Do you know who they are? None of them are cowboys..."
"then no, I probably dont know them"
"Do you want them? or can we have them?"
"y'all take these, I'll get the next ones."
"Thanks mom, your the best!"

Since by now I have decided that shaving is not a good idea I opt to just lather up and get out.
"MOM!! MOM!!"
"yes Rayley"
"Brett wont let me have the card with the guy wearing purple"
"But mom, he's a nose tackle, thats gota be cool, and hard. How do you get ahold of their noses with that helmet on?"
"But I dont like Green!"
"But he is just a safety, thats gota be a boring job, mom says its a contract sport and there is nothing safe about it!"
and Matt wants to know if he gets 4 quarterbacks does he get a dollar.
I told him no. just alot of confusion.

so like all those fancy cereals, these packs of chips are OFF my grocery list until they STOP putting goodies in the bag.

Today was a town day, but just for milk (3 gallons), bread (3 loaves) and some hamburger meat. I only took Bow and it only took me about an hour to get what I needed. I ended up spending a little less than 100.00 too. I got back 4 bucks in change! :) I will admit, I spent a good 20 minutes looking at toys for Bow. He is at the age to start enjoying them. I want to get him one of those floor mat things with the toys that hang down. I just couldnt decide which one to get him. By the time I decide he will have outgrown this stage.
Oh and I got Princess GimeGime some boots. Its her 'prize' for sleeping in her bed for a week. (its been two, but she has no sense of time) They are kinda cute, in a weird ugg knock off sort of way. They are brown with floof coming out the top, and fake laces, that tie up with a bow and 2 fluffy balls on the ends of the strings.
When she tried them on I said "look at the cute balls" and she informed me ... never mind we wont go into this conversation...


I also had to do a mystery shop at another store and was glad that Bow was in such high spirits. He was just a doll all day. smiling and flirting with everyone that walked by.

As I was getting ready to go to town BR was getting ready to go to work. He came to kiss me goodbye and said "you stink"
Gee thanks. I love you too.
"no seriously, something in your make up stinks"
I start searching and smelling everything, I dont want to put outdated stuff on my face. The last thing I need is a huge red rash across my face. I can just imagine the stares that would grant me. since I couldnt imagine the blush or eyeshadow going bad I had to guess it was the mascara or base.
I asked him what it smelled like, I was imagining rotten eggs or something. He said "sawdust"
This is the same guy that wont kiss me if I have on lipstick cause he swears it has guano in it, but in all honestly I would have thought sawdust would be kinda appealing...

Since I looked perplexed he said "I bet its that creamy goop you put on before the colored crap"
Creamy goop?? colored crap? ahhhhh the lotion? I am guessing that would make the base the 'colored crap'.
But it prevents wrinkles. And the base hides them. I cant forgo either one!
He doesnt see the logic in this. To him I would MAKE more wrinkles by using it and twisting up my nose due to the smell.

I couldnt take the time to argue with him, I had managed to put BOTH contacts in ONE eye. and couldnt get them out. Plus I had an eyelash in there. It felt like I had a 2X4 and an entire window pane in one eye. Since I am blind as a bat, I couldnt see what I was doing and gouging at my eye was NOT helping. The contacts had glued themselves together. Of course I had forgotten to put in the contacts until AFTER I put on my make up, so I had mascara running down to my chin. I would buy waterproof mascara, but last time I did this I woke up and couldnt open my eyes.

WHen I got back home with all 4 kids they were burning off the national forest that borders our place. On one side you can chunk a rock and hit the forest so it looks pretty close. The kids were freaked out. They were worried it would spread to the house and burn it down. I had to promise them that I would stay up all night and make sure we were safe.
We couldnt open the doors or the windows due to the smoke and the kids couldnt understand why there were no fire trucks to keep it in check. They had made a fire lane and I wasnt worried, but I do understand their fear. Heck the first year they came home and it was stil smoldering I thought they were never going to stop crying. it wasnt until we drove all the way up the driveway and they saw the house was still there that they calmed down. Rayley was scared all the deer would never come back. To her this meant she would NEVER get to hunt like her brothers. The boys were afraid they would burn the oat patch and the deer would starve. And then they decided that the squirrels would NOT be able to live in charred trees and thier lives were ruined. No more hunting. EVER. I convinced them this was the best thing for the wildlife and it happens EVERY YEAR.

My house smells like smoke, and you cant see the driveway, but they did calm down.

OH and this is the note I got in email from Bretts teacher.

Well I believe he has driven me crazy today. He had to stay in to clean out his desk and it took 45 minutes. He has been acting silly most of the afternoon and not getting things completed unless I stayed on him. Hopefully tomorrow will be better.

THis woman has been teaching over 20 years. It took MY kid less than 7 months to drive her crazy. I dont know if this is a record or an omen.
Of course after the room cleaning and house cleaning that was done this weekend I can tell her, 45 minutes to clean out a desk was pretty damn quick. I watched him have to make a bed. This took a good 30 minutes. And there was just 4 items. 2 sheets (that I thought would be self explanitory), a pillow and a blanket.
Matt actually put the flat sheet on, and then cinched it up with the fitted sheet over it. And was appalled when I told him this is NOT how its done.
They have been making their own beds for a while now. But it still is confusing.



After I had sent them off to bed Matt comes running back in.
"We learned about pollumnation today."
"you learned about WHAT? ohhh pollination, thats pretty neat isnt it?"
" NO pollumnation."
"Do you mean where Bee's and Butterflies carry pollen to flowers and make them grow?"
"NNNOOOOOO pollumnation"
"what the hell is pollumnation?"
"Those little particles that polumnate the air, and can kill you"
"OHHHH you mean Pollution?"
"well, if thats how you want to say it"

I am glad my dear Hoover is learning, but I am thinking he doesnt LISTEN completely to every word... This is how world wars are started..

Oh and on a personal note. Is it just my TV, or does Cindy McCain look like she has no iris'? When she stands behind ole John all you can see is slits with white. its really scary looking. Almost like she is possesed. Of course after years of listening to him I would have a permanent blank stare too I am sure.

A true American pastime. Presidents Day and Baseball. OH and Laundry!

Ahhh, Presidents day.

The day every year where I purposely keep my kids home from school because I am appalled at the lack of respect shown by our school system and the country in general for those that made this country what it is.

There are way too many holidays that they send my kids home on, for me to deal with, that dont have near the meaning of this one. Yet they feel the need to ignore this day.

And they wonder where our love and respect for our country has went.

Well since I was bound and determined to torture myself today I went ahead and made them get started on the laundry from yesterday. This was met with lots of complaints. I even heard, "I thought we only had to be mom for one day!" I said, NOPE you have to be me till you learn the concequences.
So my dear Matt said "I KNOW the concequences, NEVER have kids.. Then you wont have mom jobs."
I reckon in a round about way he is right! LOL

They got a few loads of laundry done. Nothing special, We have to stop doing laundry around here about 11:00, cause we never know when BR will get up and want a shower. Then we cant start back till after 3.

Everytime they sat something down I would wait for them to walk off and call them back to pick it up. This was starting to really get to them. They HATED it. I got a sadistic kick out of it, I will be honest.

BR had asked for a hair cut a few weeks ago, and so I decided to do them today. I got his done and then tricked Brett into coming in to the bathroom and did his. He was pretty good about it, and I told him to put his hat back on and not tell Matt, but make him bring me the broom. When I coralled him and sat him down I started cutting, He is such a wuss. He jerked his head and I ended up messing up his front. So he has a VERY short High and Tight! LOL Oh well. It will be grown back out in a week or two.

Once we had lunch and BR went to work I took the kids outside and started tossing the ball to them. There is a reason I dont volunteer to coach.
well lots of reasons, but one sticks out most of all. I dont do nice.

I throw the ball so they have to MOVE to get it. and I refuse to dive to catch it. Since we dont have anything to stop the ball they have to go and fetch it. I can say that if nothing else they will have a good lung capacity.
They did pretty well. Matt did catch a pop fly with his head once. I know it hurt, but it shocked him so bad that he couldnt help but laugh too. And in all honesty, it hit him on the safest place.
At one point I had Matt throwing a ball at a bucket, and Brett and I were tossing another. I had Bow in a stroller out of the way, and Rayley was supposed to be well out of the way hitting a ball off a tee. Every 2 minutes she wanted me to holler for her to hit the ball, and then tell her how good she did. I was watching Matt and laughing cause he was having to chase a ball down our driveway and Brett threw one that I swear was going 80 MPH. I was NOT looking at him. He hit me right in the chest. My poor boob has a bruise on it the size of a well... baseball. But it didnt hurt. seriously. It was thrown so hard I was numb.
Luckily about 5 minutes later Bow started to fuss. That was all the excuse I needed.
I got them to start tossing back and forth. This is never good. They start out okay, but it turns into a 'try to kill the sibling' rivalry. OR a 'throw it where they cant get it' game. So I still have to supervise. I was watching out the window once and Rayley had their wheelbarrow running it back and forth between them. This could have been dangerous, but luckily they were aiming at her. She was safe.

When they came in they remembered the promise from Friday about Monopoly. Oh JOY!
I told them to set it up and we got started. Then I looked at the clock. It was already 6:30. YEAH!
We played for a little while. They were getting upset with Rayley quickly. she tends to move the board alot. But she plays pretty well. Since she can count past ten she has an edge over them. And she LOVES to 'Bry' everything. Her only problem is, when she starts counting, the boys screw with her. She told them once to "SHUT UP, cant you see I'm trying to Concentrate!"
And to be like them she tries to put her money under the board. Then she picks up the board and moves everything. One time she rolled a 5. she counted it out real careful and then went to the next square, started jumping up and down and said "I'm just like George Washington! I own the White House!"

Well the boys thought this was funny. Cause Georges last name is Bush. Until she told them, "NO the FIRST George was Washington, then HE sold it to Bush, Now Bush has to sell it. He's gona sell it to Huckabee. But I'm gona be like Washington, We are both number ones! "
Now there are a few ways to look at this. One, Damn, this is SMART for a 3 year old.
Two. I watch TOO much TV on the Presidental race..
and Three, I have to fiqure out how to fit 41 other people into that real estate transaction.

The boys KNEW the first President was Washington, and can name quite a few others, BUT they thought they got to pick their own houses. I guess they thought where ever they wanted to live was where they lived. Once I explained to them that they move out when they are no longer President they understood better. They thought it was stupid to move after 4 or 8 years, but understood. Typical Male behavior, moving is too much work. Just leave the old stuff and buy new later.

Since it was getting on to time to get ready for bed I thought it best that we put up the game. Once bathtime was over and lunches made I got them in bed. They went to sleep pretty quick, or so I thought. I was in the laundry room ( I found a basket of unfolded clothes and was debating on waking up the boys... , plus they had unpiled the remaing 5 loads of laundry. AND had not turned on the dryer. ) and in came Rayley. "mom, when I REALLY do move to the White House, can they put me on that gold money? I dont like green that much, and the girl on the coin isnt that pretty, plus dollars get dirty pretty quick" I told her yes and to go to bed.

3 minutes later she was back

"Mom, can I make it a pink house instead? White gets mud on it too quick"
I was able to hold back laughter and tell her that I reckon she could, heck it might already be pink, or turquoise, or bright yellow before she got there.
She told me she would need some turquoise shoes.

oh yes, I can just see my drama queen running something... OMG. oh well, at least we will know our firearms are safe.

I gota admit, this weekend was not a bad weekend. The kids, although I could have wrung their necks a few times, were very good. I am real proud of them. And think I might be up to facing another week.
I KNOW I am looking forward to in the morning. I have the alarm set for 30 minute early. The boys have a basket of clothes to hang up.

There is more than one way to skin a cat.

Well after having no lights last night, and not being able to go to bed cause it was so hot until after 2:00 I really wanted to sleep in today. Bow was awake at 7 and wanted to play. Since BR had to go to work tonight I went ahead and got up.

Aint I nice?

I came in here and the boys were already awake. Rayley was stil passed out so they immediatly had to screw with her.

I dont know why that kids see something peaceful, pretty and quiet and have to turn it into a wailing, screaming, punch throwin machine.

Once breakfast was eaten they started out the door. I had to turn them around and remind them of the shoe debacle yesterday morning. They would be cleaning thier room today, come hell or highwater. It was such a beautiful day I hoped they would hurry so they could go out and play.

My mom showed up and feeling sorry for Rayley offered to help her clean her room. But first she bathed Bow. Its always nice to not to have to get wet bathing a kid! I got up and started picking up the tornado strewn living room. Getting more agervated with each child item I had to toss into their doorways. I survived Hurricane Rita, but Hurricanes Brett, Matt and Rayley are KILLIN me!

BR left early, since he had came home so early last night he was going to go and pull yestrdays loads and get todays done. I didnt have to be quiet, or try to keep them all happy enough they dont scream and holler and wake the dead. Or in my case, the dead asleep.

The boys just kept goofing off. They would work for a few minutes, then start wrasselin, or playin, or fightin. I had told them when it started they had an hour. I went and checked, the room looked good but when I was stepping close to a bed my foot slid under.. and hit resistance. I looked. YEP! there was ALL their toys!

They even got the bright idea to charge admission to their room, told me I'd have to put a penny in the bag hanging on their door to step inside. I told them that was fine, to come into my living room they had to pick up an item that didnt belong where it was and put it up. They thought that was a bad idea. I liked it and stuck to it.
After 2 hours I told them that I wanted it clean, and NOW. One of them popped off something about their friends moms cleaning their rooms for them. And then something about me being a bad mom, a mean mom.. who knows, I hear it all the time, I just ignore it. But the next thing said really got my attention. "Its not like you do anything anyway"
I told them 30 minutes to finish cleaning or they would clean MY house, then their room.
They didnt belive me.
I went in Rayleys room and we hung up 2 of those chains that you put stuffed animals on. I need to buy more.. But we hung up her animals and now you can see her bed!
About that time the alarm went off. I told them to come on out of the room. They had some cleaning to do.

Matt welled up and wanted to know why I wouldnt give them ONE MORE CHANCE.
I told him
1. I told you what was expected
2. I gave you a time limit
3. I told you the concequences
You made the choice.

He said "I didnt know you were serious"
well, maybe next time he will belive me.
I made them empty the dishwasher, fill it again with breakfast dishes, clean the living room, dust, pick up clothes, clean their bathroom, wipe down counters, clean off the 'catch all counter', put up the groceries we missed yesterday, sweep, scrub the sticky spots, wash the lunch dishes, wipe down the fridge and freezer, take out the trash, do 3 loads of laundry plus the 2 that was their sheets and comferters, pick up the floor after I pruned the 100's of leaves from the ivys (that was fun, I just stood on the counter and let them fall), use the mr clean eraser on at least 3 walls, 6 cabinets and the table and chairs. They had to fold, hang up and put up laundry. And put the supper dishes in the dishwasher. THey had to reempty both trashcans again, clean up after their snack, gather all the dirty clothes, and put all the DVD's back on the shelf neatly. They LITERLY fell into bed at 7:45 begging me to just let them go to sleep.

The house looks great. The trash cans need to be emptied again, both are overflowing, there is at least 6 more loads of laundry to be done, and we didnt vaccum, but I am impresed. oh yea. and I also made them clean their room back up.

On their way to bed both of them told me they were sorry they thought I didnt do anything. And asked if I would play baseball with them tomorrow. I told them I would love to, but we had to make sure that a few things were done first. At least 3 loads of laundry and some actual scrubbing on the bathroom.
They promised they would help. I am NOT holding my breath. LOL

BUT I decided that today worked out so well that I will be doing this again. Next time we will tackle my bedroom, bathroom, and the living room and kitchen all in one day. :)

I did get a few things done today. I finaly got Bow's ivy potted, and I cleaned out a fish tank, and the crab tank. Oh and pruned the ivys! Of course I think walking behind them and pointing out their shortcomings is almost as tireing as doing it myself. But it gives me warm fuzzies to do it.

Well BR just called, his truck lights just went out, so he is having to call it a night whether he wants to or not.
Me personaly, I just cant wait to wake up in the morning. There is not a whole lot of things nicer than waking up to a clean house.

And speakin of cats.. I wonder how a manxese rug would look? Fido (yes her name is Fido) has this real agervating habit of following me around caterwallin at night until I go and fill up her food bowl. The thing is, its already full. She just wants me to put fresh in there. She better quit screwing with me. I'll have her cleaning out her own litter if she aint careful!

My kids..... I think....

Sorry I didnt blog last night! We had an awful storm and it knocked out our power from about 9:30 to 4:30 this morning! ANd this laptop has a battery that only lasts 20 minutes. I did try to blog but got cut off shortly into it!

At 1:30 BR got up and looked outside, the rain and wind had passed and he could see the lights shining across the road of our nearest neighbor. The electric company had forgotten us again. My inlaws got theirs back a little over an hour after they went out. And the rest of my family down the road got theirs back around 1:30. They did the same thing to us after the hurricane that never was. Everyone had elec for a good 2 to 3 weeks before we did. Cause we are off the main line.

Yesterday started out at 8. Rayley was in my room begging me to make her breakfast. I got up and the boys were making cereal but decided that she didnt need any cause she was being mean.
I told them that we had to leave in ONE HOUR! I left Brett playing with Bow and told Matt to get dressed and then play with Bow, while Brett got dressed. I got Rayley dressed and went to do the same. I came back 20 minutes later and Matt was playing, Brett was trying to get Bow to stop screaming and Rayley had spilled koolaide down her front.
I was making them dress nice for the Housewarming shower we had to go to. I got onto Matt, told him to hurry, changed Rayley, and told Brett to get dressed.
20 minutes later I was changing Rayleys clothes again because she decided that blue didnt match her eyes (brown) and instead matched Bretts who had pissed her off when he told her she was mean for hitting him when he tried to hand her a toy to put up. Matt was still not dressed, he couldnt find his belt, and had his shirt buttoned wrong.
Brett got dressed on the first try. He found some dirty jeans in his floor, had on his mud caked tennis shoes and a T shirt. I told him to change into a button up, put on clean jeans, and that I would pay him a dollar to wear his boots. He complied. Although he was mad about the boots. Until he realized Matt again had on one of his. Then he was MORE THAN happy to do it. The ensuing fight woke up a now sleeping Bow, and netted Rayley a elbow to the cheek. Of course it all led to Matt not being able to find his other boot. And I had ran out of outfits for Rayley to wear her purple fat babies with. This meant she had to wear her knee high black boots. One of which was missing. after a total tossing of her room, I found it, and then started searching for Matts boot. Bow wasnt dressed, Brett was picking on Rayley again and Matt was practacing his Gallelaio impression.
Again, I have NEVER found one of their missing items on the ceiling.

Brett found Matts boot under the couch. Rayley put together a horendous outfit, I got Bow dressed, for the second time ( the first time I had gotten him dresed, he got hungry, I fed him, then he started laughing and spit a mouthful of milk on his clohtes), and Brett changed shirts for the 3rd time because the ones he was wearing gave his tummy 'funny feelings'.

At 10:15 we were off. Yes ONE hour and 15 minutes AFTER we should have left.
First we had to go to my grandfathers, I had to pick up a check for Amanda's shower. I was to try to buy her something on her registery, if I couldnt, give her the money.
Then we went to Aunt Jeans, same deal, except she had a check from herself and her sister. and then a 20 minute drive to town.
First stop was the baseball park, where it was raining, and I got all 4 kids out and in we went.
"Just two this year?" asks last years coach.
"Nope, you have to take all 4!"
"Heck no, that girl will have all the boys whooped."
I filled out the paper work, and then signed over the 130.00 check (there is a discount for more than one kid.. ) and he was filling in his part.
He got to the part about volenteering for coaching, umping etc. and said
"Team mom for both teams again this year?"
"sure, why not, I'm bored."

He took me seriously.

The boys visited with their old coach, and Bretts allstar coach for a few minutes. And then we were off again.

Walmart this time. I drove up the first isle I came to. I dont try to get the closest place unless one is just THERE. I get one closest to a buggy. well, I ended up in the line with the lazy mo-ron that see's someone putting in groceries and WAITS for them to get done, then leave. They want this spot so bad so they dont have to spend 3 minutes walking in that they wait 15 minutes, making traffic back up to the road. I already had 2 cars behind me and I was JUST about to get out and explain to them that they needed to move, when they got a call on their cell phone and left. About this time the person they were waiting on pulled out. HA!

I put Bow in his sling, got all 3 of the other kids and in we went. Brett with his hand in my right back pocket, Matt the left and holding Rayleys hand.

I no more than get in the door.
"oh wow, are those ALL yours?"
"all what?"
"the kids"
"why? did they wrap your house in toilet paper too?"
"uhhhh no, I just thought they were cute"
"yea, thats what the judge said too.."
*woman leaves QUICKLY!*

This time I counted it, 8 people asked me if I had a REAL baby in that sling.
I told them no, I just loved babies so much I liked to pretend dolls were real. But dont tell anyone, I promised I would stop last time they let me out of the 'nervous hospital'.

I was able to get all my shopping done, and didnt pull an ear, pop a head or thump an ear the whole time. I dont know who kidnapped my kids and replaced them, but I would like to thank them. From the bottom of my heart.
I did get some favorable comments.
"wow, you are brave"
I answer this one with "nope, stupid, but now I KNOW what those little pills are for!"
"What a nice looking bunch"
"How do you manage to leave the house with makeup on!"
(I didnt tell her that I do it the night before and sleep in it.)
"they are so polite"
They were actually so good, I had to get on to them because they kept making me stop to pick up things off the floor and put it back on the shelf. Things they DIDNT knock down!
I am in love with these imposters.
They didnt even ask for candy.
I got my groceries, and the 5 gifts, ( a really good friend was also having her housewarming at the same time today and I had to get her something), and found a cashier and explained to her that I had checks from 3 differnt people, would she call a manager so I could maybe buy the presents with them for them. She said she would do it.
WOW!
Is this really MY walmart? I cant belive it. usually they run from someone they see coming down the isle, frisk you at the door and treat you like crap because you bought size 3 diapers instead of size 2.

We put the 3 gifts up there and she started with the checks. The first time she messed up. But we went at it again, this time she put in the check with out telling it only 25.00. it charged all 76.00 to ONE aunts checking account!! OH NO!
But it was okay I told her. I would just give that aunt the other two's money. NOT a problem!! She felt so bad. But I assured her, it was not a big deal.

Off we went and I checked out. the check part of the machine I picked decided to eat my check. and then refused to work. It was my last check. I was at the checkout directly in front of my bank, but there was a long line. So I asked her to give me a minute. I ran over to my favorite banker and told her it wouldnt work, "how much" I told her 120.00 and she handed it over!
This day is getting better and better!
Unfortunatly, I had also ran out of time. It was about 12:40. I had promised to do a mystery shop today. But I just couldnt do it, The weather was getting awful, we were in for tornados and hail, and I had to get home, wrap these presents and get to two showers! one was 35 miles away! All before 2!

On the way home I fed the kids breakfast bars I had bought, and explained how important it was that they help me when we get home. Unload the truck, I would wrap, feed Bow ( who had slept through the entire shopping trip, AND was sleeping on the ride home!) and make the Ivy I had promised to make Amanda for her new house, but had forgotten!

Most of it went off with out a hitch. There was a tense moment, when I asked Matt to change Bow's diaper, He said he didnt want to.
Once Bow was changed, the presents wrapped, Ivy made ( which Rayley was very upset about, she couldnt belive I was cutting the leaves off her and the boys plants!), and Bow fed, we were ready again. It was raining again and it was 1:30. I loaded everyone back up, started a movie and off we went.

I had to drive to the first Amanda's (we keep them seperate by the names 'MY Amanda' and 'BR's Amanda', since they both have the same middle name!) She lives about 3 miles down a dirt road, but its a nice dirt road and I made good time. I dropped off her present, saw part of her BEAUTIFUL house, (a tree had went through her first one during the hurricane that never was), and said hello to everyone.

Then we were off to the other Amanda's shower. We didnt meet much bad weather, just some light rain, and were able to make really good time. I got to the other shower just 15 minutes late!
It was a very nice affair. She got lots of nice stuff and the kids were on their BEST behaviour. Everyone there told me how good they were. And how they were so impressed with my raising them. I accepted the compliments with grace and didnt try to tell them the truth. They wont ever see my kids again.


Even my Mother in Law and Sister in Laws were shocked and impressed with their behavior. I dont know if this made me proud or hurt my feelings..

Reguardless, we made it home before the really bad stuff hit, and BR ended up coming home early. He got home around 9 and decided to make bacon sandwiches. The thunder and lighting was so close that the kids were still awake, and he got about 1/2 of it done before the lights went out. The kids went to sleep in here, and BR and I fell asleep quickly there after. It was boring with out the computer!


I do know that what could have been a stressful day was blessedly calm.. But I will admit, the future scares me. I am afraid they used up all their stores of 'niceness' today and I will not see it again for a while!

Eyebrowns, Silly Putty and Eggs

I could tell it was Friday. Noone wanted to get up. The boys did. and even got dressed on their own. although I did have to send Matt back to change into pants. He had on overalls that were too short.

Usually he can get away with wearing highwaters, cause he wears those fancy cowboy boots and doesnt pull his pants down over the top. They just kinda sit on the top.

But today was a PE day and he had to wear his chukkas. His pants have to come down to a normal length. He was VERY upset about having to change. He loves his railroad overalls. To him that is dressing up! And I have to admit, he looks pretty nice in them! :)

Rayley has been sleeping in her room pretty well. But there is one drawback, she wakes up more easily in there than she does when she is asleep here on the couch in the middle of morning mayhem! I dont undestand it. She has not slept past 6:15 since she started sleeping in there. :(

Well she wanted cereal. So I got up and made it. I started just buying plain corn flakes. The kind with the rooster on the box. And I dont put sugar on them. I got tired of the constant cereal buying. And they bounce off the walls when they eat the crap. My walls are NOT that good. Anyway, she eats it likes its frosted flakes. Doesnt need sugar. I reckon it might be better for her too.
Of course this morning she ate half and wasnt hungry anymore.

About 30 minutes later I decided I wanted some oatmeal. I got up and made some. Well she heard me in the kitchen and right about the time I set down to eat she wanted me to fix her some. I told her no, she had cereal to finish. She screwed up her adorable little face and started to pout. I just looked at her, she started to whine. I told her to leave the room. Then it was full out crying. Like I had taken away her pink stuffed pig. oh and the accusations... I hated her, I didnt love her. Noone in this whole world loved her. She was going to starve to death. I told her that I did love her. and she wouldnt be hungry if she would eat that cereal. And to please just be quiet. Well she got mad then, and told me that I hated her and when I tried to argue she just got worse. So I agreed with her. Steam started coming out of her ears and she looked at me, (the tears can stop as quickly as they start), and said "well FINE, if you dont like me I will just go to my ROOM!" and off she went.
Heck, if I'da known that was all it took I would have agree'd with her 10 minutes before!

I finished my oatmeal in blessed silence and came back in the living room. Bow was awake and I had to feed him. I had no more than got comfy, unpaused the TV and got him happy that in she came. She had finished her cereal and wanted oatmeal.

I explained that I was busy right now, Once I got Bow back to sleep I would get it. This started another whine fest. I swear this jealousy is gona drive me up a wall.
Back in her room she went. Slamming her door. This scared the baby, who bit me, and then started to wail. If I JUST had one of those remote training devices... Just ONCE.
I got Bow all settled, then went in and made Princess gimenow some oatmeal. I called her out and told her it was there. Oh, she loved and hugged and thanked me so much! Down she sat to eat and I went back into the living room to do some work. 3 minutes later she was too tired to eat. I told her she had asked for it, to eat it. AGAIN with the water works. This time I just went and got her, took her little hand, put her in her bedroom and told her to sit there.
LORD the noises she made. Its a good thing we live in the country. She didnt shut up for 10 minutes.

Then she came out with her barbie and car and started playing.

When BR got up I made him some sausage and eggs. The whole time Rayley wanted to eat it. She was hungry. I told her 5 differnt times that she didnt like eggs. OH YES she did, she would inform me. I eat them. I LOVE eggs. She couldnt wait to eat. I was cleaning the kitchen as I cooked and she just kept on wanting the food. Like I was purposely cooking it slowly. I told her to eat her oatmeal. She refused, it was 'rocky'. So once it got done I put some on a tortilla and told her to sit down and eat. She took one bite, spit it out and informed me that she hated eggs and I was a mean and awful mommy for making her eat them.

I took a deep breath, counted to 10 and smiled. I smiled so sweetly, she ran from the kitchen like her tail was on fire. Right smack into her daddy. He asked what was wrong. She told him that I was trying to make her eat eggs and that I know she hates them. Luckily he had heard the BUT I LOVE THEM exchange and told her so. Well she got mad and went to her room again. But this time she was wailing about him hateing her, and how noone loves her. And how she was just gona stay in her room and starve. She could never eat again because we only ever had eggs. I wouldnt fix her anything else. She got over it quickly and out she came.

Oh Goody.

Once the boys showed up she was in high spirits again, and glad to see them. Matt was all excited and telling me he had won the 'catch a compliment' prize for the week at school. He had even won some silly putty in his prize pack.

I decided to look through their backpacks and found that Brett had made Bulldog of the week at his school.
WOW! This is great. maybe they are starting to settle down and listen. Not being 'boys' and minding like they should. I told them both how proud I was. They just were so happy. They preened like roosters for a while. Then they wanted to play monopoly. I will be honest, I just wasnt up to it. I promised them we would play on Monday since they didnt have school.
They thought I was the best mom ever!
Then one of them remembered that there WAS school on Monday. I told them, NOT for them. It was Presidents day.

Since it was raining I told them that we had a busy weekend coming up and they wouldnt have time later, so they should go and clean their room now. That way incase they were invited anywhere for the night (fingers crossed) they would be allowed to go.
This was met with LOTS of bickering, whining, and blaming.
Damn that 'not me' character.. I wish he would stop messing up my childrens neat rooms.

They did get started, but needed music first. So they went out to my truck and got my CD case. I let them have an old CD player for their room and they are really enjoying it. Next thing I know Hells Bells is blaring through the speakers.

I swear, I am going to cancel VH1 and MTV from my TV. Now BR has them listening to AC/DC!

A few hours later my Sister in Law called. She wanted the kids. I had to tell her no. They had managed to play and fight, but hadnt cleaned. such a shame.. I am not sure why I torture myself like this. I tell myself I am making them learn you have to earn privlidges.. I think I just have a self destructive personality.

One time when they came out, Matt was playing with his silly putty. They were poking holes in it, and leaving the shapes of toys in there. I told them to hand it to me, and give me the newspaper. They just looked at me like I was going to wrap it up in the newspaper and throw it away.
I wonder what would give them that impression?
I convinced them I knew what I was doing. Well they then proceeded to tell me all about it. How it would stretch and you could roll it and it wouldn't get hard if you kept it in the egg. I told them I knew. I had seen it before.

They were appalled. I had never bought it for them! By now I had the newspaper and putty and I flattened it out and laid it on the paper. Matt just knew I had ruined his putty. I pulled it off and showed them the newsprint. Then I stretched it and they were amazed! Where did I learn that?
I told them I had silly putty when I was a kid.
total silence and looks of awe
( I really hate this part!)
Then they recovered their voices.
"REALLY?" they all said in unison.
YES I said, Silly putty has been around since before your grandparents were born!
"Really?" they said.
yes.
"did you have play doh too?"
"what about Barbies" Rayely asked
I assured them, I had seen and played with both.
THen they wanted to know what else it could do.
I ALMOST told them it would float, and that it would bounce higher than that bouncy ball that Brett had hidden in his pocket and kept bouncin every time he went into the kitchen or bathroom.
BUT I regained my senses. and instead showed them that it would break, and stretch. :)

I also told them to ALWAYS put it back in the egg. It DOES NOT come out of carpet easy. Well they had lost the egg. I told Matt to just set it on the coffee table and we would find the egg later. He sat it RIGHT on the remote.
for future refrence, it doesnt come off remote buttons either.

Another time I had gotten Bow to sleep. And then all of a sudden Rayley screams from the living room "MOM! somethings wrong with BOW!!" I came running, he started screaming, she is just bouncing and frantic.. I jerked him up, started looking, asking her "whats wrong?" "what was he doing?" I got him calmed down, and made her stop hollering that he 'wasnt normal'.
I asked again, what was he doing? SLeeping, she said.
I told her I KNEW that. He had been sleeping when I went to clean up the kitchen.
"What was wrong with him."
"his eyebrowns" she said, exasperated.
"His WHAT?"
"EYEBROwNS!"
I asked again, this time with a calm I didnt feel. "what exactly is WRONG with his EYEBROWS.?"
"He doesnt have any" she said, showing some attitude.
She woke up a sleeping baby, took 5 years off my life, and made me run the water in the sink over, cause he doesnt have EYE BROWS? I explained that he did, they were just light colored and not quite as visible as hers. and they were called EYE BROWS NOT eye browns!
"OH" she said, "maybe he is normal" and flounced off.

Well if he is, He is NOT kin to her!

To refrence an earlier post. PECKED TO DEATH!

Once bedtime came they went pretty well. Matt had already fallen asleep and I went in to get him up so he could go pee. He got up, and I herded him towards the bathroom. I was on the phone with their dad and he just stood in front of me starting at me. I waved my hand towards the toilet a few times and he just stared. Then he sat on the floor. I asked him what he was doing. He said "I dont know what I am doing in here" I told him to pee. He asked "where?"
AHA! I have it fiqured out! when they go to sleep they loose all sense and some of it never comes back when they wake back up! This explains why I have to repeat everything EVERY day!!
I told him to go in the toilet. Although I really considered telling him to go outside. Just to see if he would relize it was dark and he is scared of the dark. But it was raining and the puddles and wet clothes would just be more work for me.

When I went and told Rayley to go before she fell asleep, she told me "she went that other day and didnt need to." When I started to count Brett whispered to her she better go quick, mom has that look and she's starting to count.

Now they are all asleep. Including dear little Bow, who is smiling and cooing all the time now. And wants to SIT up. he doesnt like to lay down. AT ALL. and he is getting so big! we are filling out 3-6 month clothes really well. We will be in 6-9 months before I know it! I swear, the other kids were just barely into the 3-6 month at 4 months! I know for a fact Rayley wasnt. She wore cabbage patch kid clothes for over a month!

I have a big day tomorrow, and its supposed to rain and storm and get cold. Which will be nice. Wearing shorts in the middle of Feb is just NOT right. LOL The rain and storm wont be nice. but the cold will. I have about 100 miles worth of driving tomorrow and dont want to do it in the rain.

Tomorrow is baseball sign ups. 70 bucks a kid. and the company that sponsers them buys the shirt, socks, and hat. 3 dozen baseballs retail is 100.00. Inmates maintain the grounds. I dont know where it goes. But its pitiful. And this year my kids will be on differnt teams. :( thats twice the running, twice the games, and twice the money!